


Come Closer

by emilyhbr4



Category: Hamilton - Miranda
Genre: F/M, M/M
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2016-10-04
Updated: 2017-03-19
Packaged: 2018-08-19 11:05:53
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 19
Words: 39,743
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8203435
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/emilyhbr4/pseuds/emilyhbr4
Summary: "Wednesday, November 9th was the day Eliza Hamilton and her month old son, James, passed away. A year later, Alexander Hamilton was dreading the morning that he had to wake up and face his children as he sent them off to school on the aniversary of their mother’s death."Then, John Laurens shows up, and everything changes.





	1. Anniversary

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> "It had all happened so fast; their mouths parted slightly in shock and a fear of what the world would be like without Eliza in it."

Wednesday, November 9th was the day Eliza Hamilton and her month old son, James, passed away. A year later, Alexander Hamilton was dreading the morning that he had to wake up and face his children as he sent them off to school on the aniversary of their mother’s death. Still, the day came, and the moment his eyes opened to the sound of the blaring alarm clock, he wanted to shut them again. He heard the shuffling feet of his kids getting ready for school, and knew that if they could be strong enough to get out of bed today, then so could he. 

It was raining slightly the morning that Eliza got into a taxicab with James. They needed to go across town to the doctor’s office for James’s one-month checkup. New York City was famous for reckless driving, but it had never really been a concern for the Hamiltons’. They had lived in the city their whole life and nothing had ever happened, so when Eliza’s cab skidded into another cab when turning the corner, it didn’t make any sense. 

Alex still doesn’t remember much of the phone call. Even at the time the only words he could comprehend were ‘accident’, ‘wife and child’, and ‘hospital’. His mind was a blur. He did what he was supposed to. He picked up the kids from school, called Angelica and Peggy, went to the hospital, and said his goodbyes to his wife, who wasn’t able to say goodbye back. He kissed his youngest child on the forehead, the boy whom he was just getting to know. He was already gone. 

Eliza had a little bit of life left in her according to the monitors, but it wasn’t long before she was gone too. Her entire family was by her side when she died. As the monitor flatlined, there was a moment of silence. It had all happened so fast; their mouths parted slightly in shock and a fear of what the world would be like without Eliza in it. 

Angie, Alex and Eliza’s daughter, was the first to cry. The fabric of her brother’s jacket muffled her sobs. Philip held her and let her stay on his shoulder while he allowed a few tears to fall as well.

Will, the Hamilton’s other son who was only four years old at the time, sat on his father’s lap. He looked around, saw how upset everyone was, and felt his dad holding him tighter than before. He turned around to look at him. Tears were brimming the edges of his Dad’s eyes, so he asked, “Daddy, what’s wrong? Is Mommy okay?” Alex choked on a small sob, unable to answer, and kissed the top of Will’s forehead. His son’s words still haunted him to this day. 

Just like a year ago, Alex went through the motions. He changed his clothes, brushed his teeth, and checked his phone- which only had one message on display, and it was from Angelica. It read: Morning, Alex. I know today is hard for all of us, but if you need me at all, don’t be afraid to call.

He sighed; he had been incredibly reliant on Angelica since his wife’s passing. He wasn’t a very good single dad. He was working all the time and Philip could only babysit so often. Whenever he needed help, Angelica was his first call. He owed her everything.

His morning routine ended with Alex making breakfast down in the kitchen before the kids got there. Today, he made their favorite, French toast with fresh syrup and lots of whipped cream. Will was the first one to coming running down the stairs. At first, Alex didn’t know why he was so happy, but then he realized that the day would mean nothing to the five year old. He could barely tell time, much less read the date on the calendar.

“French toast!” Will yelled, taking a seat at the counter where Alex had put out their food. He immediately began to eat, munching on his breakfast and living in his own happy, little world. 

Alex smiled, as he watched his son and sipped on his coffee. Philip was the next one to come down, which was odd. Angie usually beat him to it because it took around four alarms to drag Philip out of bed in the morning. By the look on his face, it was clear something was wrong, and he wasted no time telling his father what it was.

“Angie hasn’t even turned her light on yet. I could hear her crying through the wall,” he said quietly, in hopes that Will wasn’t paying them any attention. 

Alex sighed and whispered, “I knew this would happen.” He paused, looking at his happy son sitting at the counter, and then said, “Will, Philip and I will be right back, okay? Finish up your breakfast.”

“Okay Dad!” Will said with a smile. Alex brushed passed Philip, who quickly followed him up the stairs. Softly, he knocked on Angie’s door. 

“Angie? Honey, can I come in?” Alex asked. She was fifteen and he respected her privacy, but he would force his way in today if he needed to.

Thankfully, there was a small ‘yes’ from the other side of the door. When he and Philip both entered the room, they found Angie sitting upright in her bed under the covers with tears streaking down her face. Seeing them, she put her head into her hands and managed to get out, “No, I don’t want Philip to see me cry.”

Alex looked to Philip and shrugged in a sympathetic way. Philip cut in, “Come on, Ang, I’ve seen you cry before. It’s alright.” He sat on one side of Angie on the bed while Alex sat on the other.

“I- I’m sorry. I told my- myself I wouldn’t do this t- today,” she stuttered. 

“Angie, you have every right to do this today,” Alex said to her with a stern voice but kind eyes.

She looked up to him with teary, doe like eyes and admitted, “I miss my mom.” Then, she fell into his shoulder and started to cry again.

Alex wrapped his arm around her one side and then ran his other hand through her hair, “Shh… I know, I know. Shh…” He looked at Philip over her shoulder and he was tearing up himself. When he saw that his dad was looking, Philip immediately wiped the tears away.

When his mom died, he promised himself that he would be strong for his family. Similarly, Alex had made the same promise. Neither wanted to admit that today was harder than any other. 

~

On their way to the high school, Philip and Angie always brought Will to his elementary school first because their dad had to go to work. They did their best to hide their sadness of the day for Will’s sake. They didn’t want to make him upset. It was only every once in awhile that Will remembered the death of his mother and when he did, it wasn’t pretty. He would wake up screaming or crying and their dad would have to spend the rest of the night calming him down. When it happened during the day, he had freak-outs at school and Alex would have to leave work to get him to go back to his classroom.

Philip held his hand as we walked him to class. When they got to the door, Philip ruffled his hair and said, “Bye, buddy. Have a good day.”

While running into the classroom, Will yelled back, “Bye Phil! Bye Angie!”

“I wish I could be that happy,” Angie whispered as they watched him go.

Philip put his arm around her shoulder and squeezed it. “Let’s get to school, okay?”

“Okay,” she whispered again. Their school wasn’t too far from Will’s, so they usually walked after dropping him off. Today, their walk was quieter than it would normally be. Usually Angie had something to rant about or Philip had a funny story to tell, but today it didn’t feel quite right.

Angie watched Philip’s face as they walked. He stared straight ahead with a blank expression on his face. She didn’t understand how he was holding it together in the way that he was. She could barely speak without her voice quivering. “Philip, aren’t you upset at all?” She asked, trying to ignore the waiver in her voice. 

He looked down at her, his eyebrows knitted together in confusion. “Of course I’m upset, Angie. I miss mom more than anything.”

“It’s just, you haven’t even cried. I feel so pathetic compared to you.” Philip sighed. That’s not what he wanted at all. Luckily, at this point they were arriving at the school.

He pulled her aside into a deserted hallway. “You’re not pathetic, Ang, not at all. I haven’t cried because I’m trying to be strong for you, Dad, and Will, that’s all,” he admitted.

“Well, stop it,” she whispered, her eyes watering.

“I’ll try.” She hugged him and he kissed her forehead. Then, when she finally got the nerve to let go, he wiped her tears and said, “Go to class, okay? Text me if you need me. We don’t have to be model students today.”

“Thanks,” she responded, giving him a light smile to ease his worries. In truth, she was worried about Philip. If he held everything in, he would eventually explode.

~

After the kids left for school, Alex found himself sitting at the kitchen counter with little motivation to go to work. He would have taken the day off, but if his kids could go to school, then he could certainly muscle through work. Taking multiple big gulps of coffee and then filling his to go mug up again, he finally grabbed his brief case and made his way toward the subway.

Silently, he was hoping that people knew what today meant for him but would keep it to themselves. He didn’t want to deal with shit today, but he didn’t want to deal with sympathetic faces staring him down all day either. Unfortunately, Aaron Burr was an idiot.

“Alexander!” He exclaimed when Alex walked out of the elevator with his head down. “How are you on this fine morning?” He clapped his hand on Alex’s back. Alex cringed.

“Just fine, Burr,” Alex muttered. As usual, Aaron didn’t take the hint.

“Listen, I was hoping you and I could go over press release later, I could really use your opinion-”

“Burr! Can you shut up for two seconds?” Burr was silent. “Get Jefferson to do it. I’ve got actual work to do today.” The entire floor was looking at the two of them now. Even George Washington took a moment to step outside his office and see what was going on.

Aaron was dumbstruck. He didn’t know what to say; usually Alex didn’t yell like that until the end of the day. George took over before Aaron could make a fool of himself. “Hamilton- my office now.”

Alex bowed his head, ignoring the awkward silence and stares from his coworkers and went into George’s office. Giving the rest of his team the nod of affirmation to get back to work, George shut the door behind them. 

“Alex, what was that,” George sighed. 

“It wasn’t anything. I’m just not in the mood to deal with Aaron’s bullshit,” Alex stated, his arms crossed. 

“I can’t keep making excuses for your outbursts, Alex,” George said with a commanding voice. 

“Then don’t!” Alex exclaimed. George raised an eyebrow at him. Alex ran his hand through his hair and apologized, “No, you know I didn’t mean that. I need this job.”

“And you know I want you on my team,” George said. Then, sympathetically, he answered, “Listen, Alex, I know today is hard for you-”

“I don’t need empathy,” Alex cut in. “I’m fine, really. I should get to work.”

George gave him a look, but then sighed, “Alright.”

~

Alex worked dilligently for the rest of the day. Without Alex knowing, the rest of George’s team was given strict instructions not to bother him today. George was always looking out for Alex like a father would. With Eliza gone, he needed all of the support he could get.

Nothing was ever easy, however. Around one o’clock, Alex’s cell phone rang. “Hello?” He said, still flipping through his papers.

“Mr. Alexander Hamilton?” A voice asked back.

“This is he,” Alex responded. He scribbled a couple of things down, continuing to pay no mind to the phone call.

“Mr. Hamilton, this is Patriot Charter School, we’re calling to talk to you about your son, Philip?” Immediately, Alex dropped everything and leaned back in his chair.

“Yes?” Alex asked with a sigh. 

“We’re going to need you to come down right away sir. Philip has gotten into a fight at school. The principal needs to speak with you,” she explained. Alex closed his eyes, trying to contain the anger he felt.

“Was Philip the one to instigate?” Alex asked. He couldn’t be mad without knowing the whole story.

“We aren’t sure yet, sir.” Alex began to pack up his brief case.

“Okay, I’ll be there in less than a half hour,” Alex replied.

“Thank you, Mr. Hamilton, and no rush, he’s not going anywhere.” The secretary hung up the phone and Alex finished packing. On his way out, he stopped by George’s office.

He gave a small knock on the door and George looked up from his work. Seeing the distressed look on his face, George asked, “What’s going on, Alex?”  
“Philip got into a fight at school. I’m sorry, but I have to go down there.”

“No need for apologies. We all have family issues that need to be attended to every once in awhile,” he reasoned. Then, with a bit of hesitation, he said, “Just, make sure you get all of your work done, alright?”

Alex nodded. Of course he would get his work done. He couldn’t remember a time that he hadn’t done so. “Thank you, sir.” With that, he rushed out the door to get to the high school.


	2. Punches Thrown

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> "She doesn't forgive you for what you did."

As Alex walked to the high school at a quick pace, his phone buzzed with a million text messages from Angie. He scrolled through them, but when he replied he didn’t mention the story she had sent him. All Alex sent was, ‘Can you call?’ Angie had a free period during the day. He assumed, based on the insane amount of text messages, she was free. Luckily, she was, and he didn’t have to have the ‘no texting in class’ talk today as well. 

“Dad!” Angie exclaimed. “It wasn’t Philip’s fault; really, it wasn’t. The guy totally deserved the punch to the face. You would have been so mad-”

“Slow down,” Alex replied. “Tell me what happened. Calmly, please.” 

“Okay- sorry. Philip and I have the same lunch period and we were out sitting in the courtyard at separate tables. We have different friends, after all. Anyway, there was this older guy- a senior, I think- who kept hitting on me. I continued to wave him off, but he just kept bothering me. Eventually, Philip noticed and got involved. At first it was just words, but then he said something about Mom and Philip was the first one to take a swing. It escalated from there.”

“All of this because a boy was hitting on you?” Alex asked. He didn’t like it, but it seemed sort of ridiculous. His daughter was a strong girl; she could handle herself.

“Dad, you know he’s more sensetive today,” she reminded him. “It wouldn’t have gone down like that on any other day.”

“You’re right,” Alex sighed.

“I usually am,” Angie remarked. 

“Ha, okay,” Alex laughed. “I’ll see you when you get home. Stay out of trouble, alright?”

“Bye Dad.” With that, she was gone and Alex was entering the school. Having been briefed on the subject, Alex was ready to roll up his sleeves and fight with the administrator that thought he was going to suspend his son.

When he arrived at the principal’s office, Philip was sitting quietly on his phone next to the secretary who looked fairly unamused. Philip rose when he saw his father. Clearly, he was uncomfortable and showed it by shoving his hands into his pockets.

“The kid deserved it, pop,” Philip mumbled.

Alex put a hand on his shoulder and squeezed it a bit. “Before we go in there, why don’t you tell me the story? Angie gave me the basics over the phone, but-”  
“Angelica called you?” Philip had a stern look on his face. He almost never used her full name like that.

“Yes, is that a problem?” Alex asked inquisitively.

“She shouldn’t have called,” he muttered.

“Just tell me the story, Philip,” Alex demanded.

~

“Phil, you finished the law homework?” One of Philip’s friends called from across the table.

“Yeah, I finished it, but no way in hell you’re copying it,” Philip laughed.

“Aw, come on man,” he whined.

“No way,” Philip laughed again.

Another one of his friends sitting next to him then nudged Philip and said, “Yo, Phil, who’s that guy getting all up on your sister?”

Philip turned around to see his sister sitting with her friends, being harrassed by a guy that looked way to old to even be slightly interested in her. “That’s George Eacker,” Philip remarked, standing up and getting defensive.

“Isn’t he a senior like us?” His friend asked.

“Yeah. Who the fuck does he think he is?” Philip strode over to George, his sleeves rolled up to his forearms.

When he got closer, George’s voice became audible. He heard George say, “Your momma teach you those manners?” If Philip was angry before, he was infuriated now.  
“George, she clearly doesn’t want to talk to you, so get the hell away from her,” Philip said, grabbing George’s shoulder and pulling him away from Angie.

George looked Philip up and down then glanced back at Angie. “You let other people fight your battles for you? Who is this guy; he you’re boyfriend?”

Angie opened her mouth to speak, but Philip cut in. “Her brother, actually.”

“Aw, big bro I think you’re being a bit over protective, don’t you?” George smirked. Angie was standing up with her arms folded now. It was clear she wanted to say something, but at the same time didn’t want to get involved.

Philip ignored the comment and instead said, “You’re harrassing a sophomore. Leave her alone.” He gritted his teeth and tried not to be the first one to throw a punch.

“Oh please. You’re Hamiltons’, aren’t you?” He didn’t wait for an answer. “Didn’t your dad go fucking around with some girl while he was still married? You’re probably the same as him.”

“Don’t you dare talk about my father like that!”

“No wonder your sister doesn’t have any manners. You come from a house of sluts. Your mom’s probably a prositute too.” George snickered, but his laugh was quickly drowned out by the punch Philip threw at his face.

~

Alex was quiet for a moment. “It seems Angie left out a few things,” he muttered while running a hand through his hair. Philip looked up to him in a guilty way, but Alex knew he had no reason to feel guilty. He would have taken more than just a swing if he were in Philip’s situation. “Let’s go in.”

Four years ago, three years before Eliza died, Alex was in a rough place. It was an election year and George was up for a spot in congress. The stress began to pile on and his morality began to slip. He did something he wasn’t proud of and to make it worse, it was with an intern. Somehow, the press got involved. The headlines on the articles said things like, ‘George Washington’s Right Hand Man Committing Adultery!’ Eliza asked questions and Alex didn’t have answers. He put out a press release revealing what he had done, emphasizing that it had been a mistake. Philip was thirteen; Angie was eleven. They still lived with his affair in the back of their minds every day.  
Trying to shake the memories from his thoughts, Alex walked into the principal’s office and, suddenly, the world stopped. 

The man sitting behind the desk, who Alex assumed was the principal, was mesmerizing. He had curly, brown hair that was pulled up into a ponytail and freckles that dotted his nose and cheeks. He had a very official look on his face, but his dimples hinted at a smile. Alex had to remind himself to breath.

Unfortunately, seeing Mr. Eacker and George sitting in the two chairs across from the man brought him back to reality. Mr. Eacker stood to shake his hand.  
“Mr. Hamilton,” he said with dismay.

Alex returned the favor. “Mr. Eacker.”

The principal looked disgruntled. “Gentlemen, thank you for coming in,” he said, clearing his throat. “Clearly, the boys both have different sides of the story, but no matter what, physical violence cannot be tolerated on my campus.”

Alex looked to the man’s name plate and said, “Mr. Laurens, sir, with all due respect-”

“Call me John,” the principal said. Alex smiled for a moment, but then remembered the task at hand.

“John, my son was only trying to defend my daughter and my name. It seems that George here was harrassing her, and Philip stepped in.”

John sighed. “Is this true, George?”

“My son was doing nothing of the sort. Right, George?” Mr. Eacker said pointedly to his son.

“Yes, father.” George shrunk into his chair. It seemed that he could not act all high and mighty when he was sitting next to his dad.

John mulled over his thoughts for a moment. “Mr. Hamilton, will you and your son please step out for a moment? I think I’d like to do this seperately, if you don’t mind.”

“Yes, yes, of course,” Alex responded, nodding his head in agreement. “Call me, Alex,” he added before walking out the door with Philip.

Alex and Philip sat outside the office in uncomfortable chairs, hoping for the best. Alex began to go through his phone, seeing that there were a few missed text messages from his sister in law.

Angelica: Angie just texted me to tell me what’s going on. Do you need anything? This George kid sounds like a douche.

Alex laughed. It was hard to imagine Angelica saying ‘douche’ in any context.

Alex: Agreed, total douche. We’re sitting outside the principal’s office waiting for the verdict.

Angelica: Hopefully they won’t be too harsh. Kid’s got enough on his plate.

Alex: There has never been a more true statement.

Angelica: Good luck!

Next to her last text, she sent a bunch of smiley face emojis, obviously trying to lighten the mood. It wasn’t long before they were called back in again. Mr. Eacker basically dragged his son out by the neck.

In uncomfortable silence, they took their seats back in front of John Laurens’s desk. He was the first one to speak. “Listen, Philip, I obviously can’t let you go off scot free. You hit another boy in the school yard.” Alex and Philip both grimaced. They knew what was coming. “But, it’s clear that your actions were not unprovoked. A few students have come in to give their sides of the story, and what he said to you was unfortunate. You’ll be receiving a one-day suspension from school, and I expect that all of your schoolwork that you miss will be made up. Are we clear?”

Philip was wide eyed in shock. He wasn’t expecting such a pleasant punishment. “Y-yes sir. Thank you, Mr. Laurens.”

“Just, don’t do it again, okay Hamilton?” His face softened. It was clear he liked the boy.

“Thank you, John,” Alex said, shaking the man’s hand. 

“My pleasure.”

~

“He didn’t ground you, did he?” Angie asked Philip. He was sitting on the chair in the corner of her room, doing his homework and talking with her. This wasn’t unusual for them. They had become really close over the past two years, especially after Eliza died.

“No, thank god,” Philip sighed. “Honestly, he probably would have done the same thing, so he can’t exactly ground me.” 

Angie laughed. “Too true.”

“Angie, why didn’t you tell Dad about what George said about his affair?” 

She looked down at her homework and shrugged her shoulders. “I didn’t want to upset him,” she muttered.

“It happened a long time ago, Ang. It wouldn’t have upset him,” Philip explained.

“Yeah, well it upsets me,” Angie snapped. She looked up at him with sad eyes. “I’m sorry. I just, don’t like to talk about it.”

Before Philip got the chance to respond, Alex was knocking on the door. “Philip? Ang?” He asked from the other side. “Can I come in?”'

Angie wiped the tears that were forming in her eyes and Philip said, “Yeah.”

He stepped in, his hands in his pockets and a fake smile on his face. “Are you guys alright?” 

“Yeah, we’re good,” Philip replied. The look on Angie’s face said otherwise, but he let it slide. “What’s up?”

“Listen, you guys, I know today has been rough. Do you wanna watch a movie with Will and I? Maybe we can get our minds off of everything,” Alex tried.

Philip glanced at Angie and then said, “Yeah, but can you give us a second?”

Alex gave Philip a concerned look, but Philip just pursed his lips together and slightly shook his head. “No problem. I’ll go pop some popcorn.”

“What’d you do that for?” Angie asked quietly after their dad had left the room.

“Ang, we gotta talk about this.”

“No, we don’t. You’re right, it’s over, so I should get over it,” Angie sniffed.

“You and I both know it’s not about the affair; it’s about Mom,” Philip empathasized. Angie rolled her eyes slightly. “Don’t do that. You’re mad that he hurt Mom; I get it. But she forgave him before she died. Why can’t you?”

Angie’s lips quivered. “I- I don’t know.”

Philip paused. This hadn’t come up in a really long time, but he had a feeling it wasn’t going to go away. People at school knew. They were going to ask questions. “Let’s go watch the movie, okay?”

“Okay,” Angie whispered.

~

During the movie, both Angie and Will fell asleep. Will was in Alex’s lap, while Angie was leaning on Philip’s shoulder. It had been a long day. When Alex was sure the two were asleep, he whispered, “What was going on in Angie’s room? She was clearly upset.”

Philip turned his head, but made sure not move too much so that he wouldn’t wake his sister. “She was upset about the Reynold’s Article.”

Alex cocked his head and bit his lip. “Really? Did George get to her?”

“I don’t think it was George, I think it’s the fact that the whole school probably knows by now. I don’t know how George found out. We were so young when it happened, none of our friends paid any attention, but now they will,” Philip explained. “She’s embarrassed.”

Alex ran his hand through his hair and kissed Will on the top of his head. He didn’t know how to respond. He had been dealing with this for years. He explained it to his kids when they were younger. He didn’t want to keep talking about it, but it seemed they were going to have to.

“Dad?” Philip whispered after a little while. 

“Yeah Phil?”

“She doesn’t forgive you for what you did.” Alex nodded in response. There wasn’t much more he could say tonight. He turned off the television and picked up Will.

“Can you get her to bed?” Alex asked, beginning to take Will to his room.

“Yeah, I got her.” He nudged Angie, but she didn’t wake up. It was clear she was completely out. It had been awhile since he had done so, but he picked her up and carried her to her room. She was lucky to be getting uninterrupted sleep, so he let her be. “Night, Ang,” he whispered.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> there has been so much positive feedback towards this fic, I just had to write more! If you've never read any of my stuff, quick note: I reply to every single comment and truly appreciate every kudos! Thanks for the love!
> 
> xoxo  
> Emily


	3. Coffee

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> "Alex's mind was lost in the principal named John who he knew virtually nothing about."

Luckily for the Hamiltons’, the next day was Saturday so Alex didn’t have work and the kids didn’t have school. As usual, Alex woke up early. He wasn’t one for sleeping in. Angie and Philip, being the teenagers they were, often slept late. Will was usually up around the same time as him, however. It was nice to have some quality time alone with him sometimes. 

So, like they did every Saturday, Will and Alex went to the coffee shop down the street to get their breakfast. Alex held Will’s hand as they walked down the sidewalk together. Every morning was a busy morning in New York City and Will was an energetic little dude, so Alex had no doubt that if he let go, Will would take off running down the street.

On this particular morning, Will decided to skip, his arm swinging interlocked with his Dad’s. Alex smiled as he watched his little face that was filled with glee. “Daddy?” Will asked, still in his own little world. 

“Yeah bud?” Alex directed him around the corner.

“Can we go to the park today? And can Pip and Angie come too?” When he was a baby, he couldn’t exactly say ‘Philip’, so he called him ‘Pip’ instead. The name had sort of just stuck. The little boy looked up to his siblings like they were his whole world. He wanted to do everything with them. 

“Sure, we can go. You’ll have to ask Angie and Philip when we get home if they want to come,” Alex explained. The two had busy lives. He wasn’t going to commit them to anything without talking to them first.

“Okay!” He exclaimed.

With that, they walked into the coffee shop, the little bells ringing above the door as they walked in. They waited in line, and Alex didn’t bother asking Will what he wanted. They got the same thing every weekend. Still holding onto Will’s hand, he stepped up to the cashier and placed their order.

“One hot chocolate, two peppermint mochas, two coffees black, four croissants, and three chocolate chip muffins please.” The hot chocolate was for Will. There was no way Alex would ever give that boy coffee. The mochas were for Angie and Angelica, while the two black coffees were for he and his son. Philip was just like Alex; he needed straight coffee to wake him up in the morning.

He handed Will’s hot chocolate to him and let go of his hand to take out his wallet to pay. Quicky, he put the drinks on a carrying tray and grabbed the pastry bags. Then, he turned around to see Will, who had run off in Alex’s absence, standing next to a man who he had spilled hot chocolate all over.

“Oh god, Will!” He ran over to his son. “I am so sorry,” he said to the man. He was hunched over, using a napkin to get the hot chocolate out of his pants. 

“No worries,” the man laughed. “It was an accident.” Then, when he looked up Alex realized that he wasn’t just any man; it was Philip and Angie’s principal, John Laurens. 

“John, what a coincidence.” He tried to smile but it came out more as a grimace. He wanted to see John again, of course, but this wasn’t the way he had pictured it at all.

“Alex! Good to see you again man,” John said with a genuine smile. He stepped forward to shake his hand, which Alex returned. At this point, Will was hiding behind his father, deeply embarrassed about what he had done.

“You too.” He brought his son around to the front of him “This is Will, my other son.”

“Quite the bunch you’ve got there, Alex,” John laughed. “Angie and Philip are great kids. You should be very proud.”

“I am,” Alex blushed. He knew that a lot of his kid’s success had to do with Eliza. She was such a great Mom. There was a slight pause where Alex and John were simply just looking into each other’s eyes. Eventually, Alex cleared his throat and said, “Well, we should get going. It was good to see you.”

Then, he placed the pastry bags on top of the coffees so that he would have a free hand for Will. They had just stepped out the door when John came running after them on the sidewalk. “Alex, wait!”

He turned around to see John standing in front of them, slightly out of breath. “This is sort of unprofessional, but here’s my number.” He handed him his card. “Call me sometime.” The man was forward, Alex had to give him that.

Against his better judgement, Alex replied, “I will.”

~

The rest of their walk home was uneventful. Alex’s mind was lost in the principal named John who he knew virtually nothing about. Will was just as happy as he was on the walk to the coffee shop. The only thing he asked was when they were going to the park. Alex told him ‘soon’ and they continued merrily on their way.

When they walked into the apartment, Angelica was sitting at the counter, drinking ice water and presumably waiting for her coffee. Will immediately ran up to her and yelled, “Aunt Angelica!” In return she scooped him up into her chair and sat him on her lap.

“How was your walk?” She asked him with a sweet voice. Alex set his wallet and cell phone down on the counter then gave Angelica her coffee. “Mm thank you,” she said to him. Alex nodded.

“Fun!” Will exclaimed. “A man named John gave Daddy a phone number!” Alex had to admit, for the kid’s limited vocabulary, he was incredibly perceptive.  
“A man gave Daddy a phone number?” Angelica asked incredulously. Will nodded fervently. 

Alex cleared his throat. “Will, why don’t you go get Angie and Philip and bring them downstairs for breakfast?” 

Will hopped down from Angelica’s lap and ran to the second floor of the apartment to his sibling’s rooms. When he was gone, Angelica, stared at him, waiting for an explanation. Alex found interest in his hands. Eventually, Angelica said, “Well?”

“I got a phone number, big deal,” Alex shrugged. He was trying to play it off, but Angelica saw right through him.

“For the first time since Eliza died,” Angelica helped. He looked sad for a moment. “This is a good thing! You’re getting out there!” She held onto his hands with hope in her eyes.

“It’s not right, Angelica. He’s Philip and Angie’s principal,” Alex explained.

“That’s not a big deal, Alex. Text him. I’ll help you hide it. If by some miracle it becomes serious, you’ll tell the kids then,” Angelica tried. She wanted more than anything for Alex to find love again. It’s what Eliza would have wanted. Alex nodded, but before he could reply the kids walked into the room.

“Tell the kids what?” Philip asked. He strode into the room, still in his pajamas and rubbing his eyes. Angie followed. She looked just as tired. Will, on the other hand, was still his bubbly little self.

“That the best dad in the world got you croissants and muffins this morning,” Alex covered. Angie let out a small laugh. She found her dad’s jokes to be endearing.

“Criossants and muffins?” She repeated. “What is this, a holiday?” Philip and Angie both pulled their coffees out of the carrying tray and began to drink them down.

“No,” Alex said, pulling his daughter closer to him. “I just wanted to treat my kids. Is that all right with you?” He kissed the top of her head.

“Perfectly fine with me,” she answered, beginning to eat her muffin. As Angelica began to ask the kids about school and other things, Alex discreetly pulled out his cell phone and sent a text to John. 

Alex: Hey, John, it’s Alex. I was thinking that maybe you’d like to get together sometime soon? 

Alex hesitated before he pressed the send button. For some reason, the text felt incredibly risky. What if he said no? Then Alex would be putting himself out there for nothing. Rejection would probably feel worse than being alone. Luckily, gray dots appeared on the screen.

John: I’d love to! How about tonight? 

Alex: Tonight sounds great. Drinks at the Patriot at seven?

The Patriot was a semi expensive resturaunt and Alex hoped John wouldn’t be too put off by that fact. Alex had money; there was no use hiding it. His job working for George paid better than most.

John: Perfect. I’ll meet you there.

A smile appeared on Alex’s face. “Who ya texting, Dad?” Philip asked. It was easy for him to read his father.

“Oh, someone from work just told me a joke, that’s all,” Alex lied for the second time that morning. Then, like a discreet teenager standing in front of his parents, he texted Angelica instead of saying something to her out loud.

Alex: Date with John tonight at seven. Can you take the kids?

Angelica looked up at him with glee then quickly texted him back. Luckily, the kids were too absorbed in their food.

Angelica: Of course!

“Hey, you guys, you wanna sleep over at my house tonight?” Angelica asked.

“Oo can we?” Angie squealed. Philip seemed a bit less amused than Angie did, however. Angelica didn’t take any notice.

“Yes! We can bake cookies and do other slumber party stuff. It’ll be fun,” she said quickly. Will cheered and Angie smiled. They loved hanging out with their aunt.

“I-I can’t,” Philip stammered, running his hand through his hair. Angelica looked hurt, so he added. “It’s not that I don’t want to hang out with you, I’m just supposed to study with this girl tonight.”

“Study? On a Saturday night? With a girl?” Alex asked, eyeing his son.

“Yeah, we’re just going to the library. It’s no big deal. We’re going at like six or so,” he explained.

“Well, I guess that’s alright. Just be home by ten, okay?” Alex said, trying not to embarrass him. The entire time Philip was talking, Angie was trying to hold in her comments. Eventually, she couldn’t take it any more.

“Can Philip and I be excused?” She asked.

“I’m not done yet,” Philip replied, shoving his criossant into his mouth.

Angie didn’t care. She grabbed Philip by the hand and pulled him out of his seat. “We’ll be right back,” she said with a smile. As soon as they were gone, both Angelica and Alex burst out into laughter.

Still laughing, Alex said, “Will, why don’t you go off and play?”

He nodded and hopped down from his chair, but before he left, he tugged on his aunt’s shirt and said, “Aunt Angelica, will you go to the park with me today?”

She gave a sideways glance to Alex and replied, “How about when I pick you up tonight, we go to the park before going back to my house?”

“Yay!” He yelled, and then ran off to his playroom to play with his toys.

“So it seems you and your son both have dates tonight,” Angelica pointed out. “Where are you going?”

“To the Patriot for drinks,” Alex replied.

“Wow, fancy,” Angelica said with a smirk on her face. 

“Oh, shut up. I like him,” Alex laughed. “Thanks for taking the kids.” They smiled as finished their coffee.

~

Angie dragged Philip all the way to her room and pushed him onto her bed, quickly closing the door behind her. “You have a date,” she stated. “Even better, it’s with Theodosia Burr, isn’t it?”

Philip scoffed. “No.” Angie gave him a look that immediately caused him to fold. “Alright, yes. But it’s not a big deal, Angie!”

“It is totally a big deal!” She exclaimed. “You’ve been after this girl for months and besides, she’s a Burr! I cannot believe you didn’t tell me.” Philip rolled his eyes. She tended to make things like this bigger than they actually were.

“I was going to tell you eventually,” Philip explained. Then, a sheepish look appeared on his face. “I don’t want to get my hopes up. She may not even like me.”  
“Aw, come on, she likes you. I see the way that girl looks at you. It’s undeniable.”

“Maybe,” Philip replied, though still unsure. 

Then, as younger siblings do, Angie ran off singing, “Philip and Theo sitting in a tree, K-I-S-S-I-N-G!” Philip had to tackle her in the hallway so that she wouldn’t go any further.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> JOHN IS COMING I PROMISE. I tend to drag the gooey stuff out and then hit you with the painful stuff fast. Hopefully you like that! Also, Theo and Philip, am I right?! It's not going to stay this happy for long, so watch out. 
> 
> As always I appreciated every kudos and reply back to every comment! Love you guys!
> 
> xoxo  
> Emily


	4. Dates

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> "Like father like son."

Alex tapped his fingers on the table as he waited for John to arrive at the restaurant. Unlike his usual fashion, he was early for their drinks. With every passing second, he became more nervous. At the strike of seven, he began to think that John wasn’t even going to show up at all. Maybe he decided that it was unprofessional to go out with one of his student’s parents. He would probably be right. Maybe he had decided that he didn’t actually even like Alex. Maybe he wasn’t even into guys, and Alex was reading this situation totally wrong.

Then, at 7:01, John walked through the door with a wide smile on his face. Alex stood up and fixed his tie, hoping that he still looked as presentable as he was when he left the house. His long hair tended to get away from him.

“Alex,” he said. Alex went in for a handshake, but John brought him into an embrace. It was clear that he was more forward than Alex would ever be when it came to stuff like this. Luckily, now Alex knew for sure that John was definitely interested. “It’s good to see you again.”

“You too.” Alex took his coat and placed on the hook next to their table. “Thanks for agreeing to come out with me tonight.” Alex cursed himself in his head. He knew he was being too formal. 

“Yeah, anytime Alex,” John said, beginning to look through the menu. “How are the kids?”

“Oh, they’re great. Philip is actually out on a date himself tonight,” Alex chuckled.

“Like father like son,” John smirked. Alex smiled. It was a real date. He hadn’t been on a date since college.

“Angie and Will are sleeping over at my sister in law Angelica’s house, which they love.”

Then, John did that thing that everyone did when they remembered Alex was a widow. He tilted is head and gave him a sympathetic look. “Alex, I-”

Alex held up his hand to stop him. “John, don’t. I’m fine, really. I don’t want to focus on that tonight.”

John gave him smile. “That’s okay.”

“I mean, maybe we can talk about it someday if this continues, which I hope it does, I just don’t think I make a very good first impression when I talk about my dead wife-” Alex rambled.

“It’s really okay, Alex,” John said, stopping him. “I don’t mind. I want to get to know you.”

“I want to get you too,” Alex replied. “Considering I barely know you, you should go first.”

John laughed slightly. It was true; Alex really knew nothing about him. John only knew the information he had acquired through school. “Okay, what do you want to know?”  
“Anything; everything.”

“Okay, well, I’m 38 years old. I got divorced around six years ago. It was a bad marriage; we were only doing it for our families, really. Her name was Martha. After we were done, I came out as gay.” He said all of this very plainly, as if it wasn’t difficult at all, though Alex knew better. Secretly, Alex felt better. He wasn’t the only on in this relationship with baggage. “I have a daughter; her name is Frances. She’s twelve and absolutely brilliant. She’s taken the whole thing really well.”

“Wow,” Alex responded, slightly taken aback. 

“If you want to run I won’t be offended.”

“That’s not what I was thinking at all. I’m actually relieved, to be quite honest. You understand the whole kid thing and you already know my situation,” Alex rambled again. He had a tendency to do that when he was nervous.

“I guess I should mention that I don’t have custody of Frances. The judge wasn’t exactly ‘accepting’ of my situation. I still get to visit her, however,” John added.

“Oh, I’m so sorry, John.” Alex couldn’t imagine not seeing his children.

John began to reply, but he was cut off by Alex’s lips meeting his. Those were the only words they needed.

~

“Aunt Angelica?” Angie asked as they swung together on the swings, watching Will play on the playground. 

“Yeah hon?” Angelica replied.

“What’s wrong with Dad? He seemed all fidgety tonight before we left. Is something going on?” Angelica had to give it to the girl: she was perceptive. She paused for a moment, trying to think of what to say.

“No, nothing special. He just had a dinner meeting he was a bit worried about I think.” That seemed believable. Angie seemed to only half buy it.

“Alright…” she replied hesitantly. 

“So how do you feel about Philip going on a date?” Angelica said excitedly, changing the subject and giving her a squeeze on the thigh.

“I just hope he doesn’t screw it up,” Angie laughed. “He’s been eyeing Theodosia for awhile.”

“Theodosia? As in Theodosia Burr?” Angelica asked with wide eyes. Oh, Alexander was going to have a field day with that one. 

Quickly, Angie realized what she had done. “Shit,” she muttered.

“Language,” Angelica scolded. 

“Sorry,” she apologized. “But please don’t tell Dad. He didn’t want him to know. God, I’m such a blabbermouth.” Angie put her head in her hands and sighed. Philip had told her that in confidence.

“I won’t say anything. But if their relationship is to continue, your father’s going to have to find out sooner or later,” Angelica reminded her.

Angie scoffed. “Right, like he told us about all of his relationships. His affair with Maria was my favorite one that he indulged in telling us.” She looked over to her aunt who was giving her an uncomfortable sideways glance. It seemed that Angie was the only one out of all of them who wasn’t willing to forget.

“Angie, you were so young when all of that happened. I think it’s time to let it go,” Angelica replied carefully.

“But now that I’m older I understand it even more, Aunt Angelica! How dare he cheat on mom? All she ever did was love him!” She turned her body to look her aunt straight in the eye. “She was your sister. How did you ever forgive him? How did she forgive him?”

Angelica paused. She could see the hatred and fire in her niece’s eyes. Unfortunately, she didn’t have a direct answer for her. “It took time and a lot of conversations with your father. In the end, though, it mostly took time.”

“I’ve had the same amount of time that you’ve had,” Angie mumbled.

“Have you thought about talking to your father?”

“No, that would just be awkward.”

“I think you need to talk to him. These feelings won’t go away until you do.” Angie didn’t respond. She clearly didn’t want to talk about it anymore. She didn’t want to think about the things that he did with her.

Luckily, Will ran up to them at that moment and said, “Auntie! Angie! I’m hungry!”

“Let’s go get some dinner back at the apartment, okay?” Angelica grabbed his hand and the three of them walked back together.

~

It wasn’t long before John and Alex were full on making out in the back of a taxi, having completely abandoned the idea of drinks and dinner. As hot and heavy as it was, John was gasping for air when he quickly shouted out his address. Alex kissed bit John’s lip then went into kiss his neck, allowing John to lean back, close his eyes, and enjoy the moment. 

As they neared the apartment, John had to grab hold of Alex’s chin and lips to get him to pause. Alex looked up at him and became distressed, “Why are we stopping?” He asked through breaths.

“Let’s take it slow.”

Alex frowned and moved away from him slightly. “Is it something I did?”

John grabbed onto Alex’s hand and moved into him. He didn’t want Alex to get the wrong idea. “No, Alex, I really like you. I don’t want this just to be a one night stand.”

He paused, mulling over his words. “I want more than that. Don’t you?”

Alex leaned on his chest and John put his arm around his shoulder. “Of course I want more than that. I like you too.”

“Then let’s take this slow. We don’t need to do everything tonight.” Alex smiled warmly and sunk into the man behind him. He couldn’t believe how happy John made him. 

“I am so glad you decided to get coffee this morning.”

John laughed slightly. “I’m glad your son spilled his hot chocolate all over me.” Alex burst out laughing. He couldn’t help himself.

~

Philip must have tapped his pencil on his notebook twenty times in the silence. 

Theodosia was sitting across from him, wrapped up in her chemistry notes. They had come to the library to study, but Philip didn’t think they were actually going to study.

“Isn’t Mr. Bombard a total drag?” Philip asked trying to break up the awkwardness. 

“The worst,” Theodosia replied. She looked down at his paper and then back up at him. “Philip, you haven’t moved from that page in the last twenty minutes. We’re supposed to be studying for the midterm.” 

Philip sighed. “But how can I study if you’re sitting across from me, distracting me?”

Theodosia bit her lip and let out a small giggle. Hamilton was really laying on the charm. “Hm, well, then I suppose we’ll have to study together.”

He raised an eyebrow at her. “Or we could go do something fun,” he tried.

She rolled her eyes at him but then checked her watch and decided, “Twenty minutes of straight studying, then we can go get coffee.”

He conceded. “Alright, hit me.” 

She picked up the first flashcard and read, “What is the powerhouse of the cell?” His eyes became slightly panicked. “Oh, come on, this is the easiest question! You do need to study.”

He tried to put on a cocky smile. “I’m kidding, I know the answer is…” he paused for a moment, as if thinking it over, but then began to lean toward the girl. When she didn’t move away, Philip kissed her. He could feel the sparks flying between them.

When Theodosia pulled away, her eyes were still closed, feeling the remainder of their kiss on her lips. “Mitochondria,” Philip said with a smile, bringing her out of her trance. “The mitochondria is the powerhouse of the cell.”

Theodosia let out a burst of air and replied, “That’s right.” Then with wide eyes and look of admiration in her eyes, she said, “Let’s get out of here.”

“Gladly. It seems we’re already pretty good at the whole chemistry thing.” 

Theodosia heartily laughed and tried to ignore the nagging guilt in her mind about not telling her father about going on a date with Philip Hamilton. Oh, what would he say?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Just as a heads up, I'm not very good at writing smut so I usually don't focus on it. If that's what you're looking for, I'm sorry! I hope you liked the update. If you did, drop a kudos or a comment! I reply to all comments :)
> 
> xoxo  
> Emily


	5. The Morning After

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> "She didn't believe a word he said, and why should she? He lied before; he could lie again."

Alex woke up next to John with the sheets tangled around them. When Alex realized where he was, he sighed pleasantly and sank deeper into the man’s chest. They had done nothing of importance the night before except for getting to know each other and making out, a lot. It was nice to be with man and touch him this way again. He loved the feeling.

Casually, his eyes glanced and at the clock and his feeling of calm was replaced with a feeling of pure panic. “Shit!” He yelled, waking John up and springing out of bed.

“W-What?” John mumbled sleepily, his eyes still half closed.

“My kids, I’m late, I was supposed to pick them up from my sister in law’s house and- oh god, Angie’s going to be so suspicious,” Alex rambled. 

“Why would she be suspicious?” John asked as Alex began to pull on a shirt.

“I didn’t exactly tell my kids I was going on a date. I didn’t know what we would be, and I didn’t want to freak them out.”

“That’s okay, I wouldn’t expect you to tell them right away,” John said with an understanding glance.  
“Besides, my kids haven’t exactly seen their dad with a man before. I’ll have to explain that-”

“We’ll cross that bridge when we come to it,” John cut in. “I want this to continue, Alex.”

“So do I,” Alex smiled. “I’m sorry, I have to call my sister in law.” John returned the smile, and then went into the bathroom to take a quick shower. The phone rang twice before Angelica picked up. “Angelica! I’m so sorry, I over slept and John-”

“Alex!” She exclaimed, cutting him off. “You’re on speaker phone with all of your kids in the car.”

Alex’s face turned white. He tried to cover it up. “Hey kids! How was your night with Aunt Angelica?”

“So fun!” Will exclaimed.

“Who’s John?” Angie immediately asked, ignoring his question.

“A co-worker,” Alex said quickly. Angie didn’t respond.

“We’re headed to brunch downtown at the Garden, would you like to join us? Philip is going to meet us there,” Angelica said, covering up the awkward silence from her niece.

“Yes, of course, I’ll be there in less than a half an hour,” Alex replied, thankful for his sister in law’s calm state. He, on the other hand, was a complete mess.

“Great, we’ll see you then,” Angelica said, then hung up the phone. Alex breathed a sigh of relief. Then John, hearing Alex hung up the phone, came out of the bathroom, a towel around his waist.  
“Is everything okay?” He asked.

“Yeah, I think Angelica and I covered it up. I’m meeting them downtown at the Garden for brunch,” Alex replied, leaning back with his arms behind his head on the bed. 

John began to button up his shirt. “I love the Garden. Great restaurant.”

“We should go sometime,” Alex smiled. 

“I would love nothing more.” Then, Alex grabbed his bag, realizing that he needed to get going. 

“When can we see eachother again?” John asked, being more forward with the man than he had been with anybody in a long time. He needed to see Alexander again.

“As soon as possible. Tomorrow, even. I’ll text you,” Alex opened the door with a clear look of excitement on his face. 

John stepped toward him and planted a kiss on his lips. “Tomorrow,” he repeated. Then, Alexander left without another word, hapiness filling him.

~

Philip had barely gotten any sleep. After dropping Theo off at her house, they talked on the phone until three in the morning, and then past out while the line was still on. She had gotten up earlier than him and hung the phone up, but then Philip woke up to a good morning text to make up for it. Together, they made it clear that they wanted their relationship to continue.

Around 9:30, his phone blared with his ringtone and woke him up from a deep sleep. Seeing Angelica’s name on the screen, he knew he had to answer it, but he still paused before he did.   
“What’s up?” He groaned.

“Why aren’t you awake yet?” Angelica asked, chipper as ever. She was a morning person.

“It’s early,” he sighed.

“Well get your lazy ass out of bed! We’re going to the Garden!”

He was hungry, and the Garden was great, but his bed was also really comfortable. “Mm I don’t know…” He mumbled.

“It’s not a choice. Take the subway, I’ll see you in thirty,” Angelica stated and then hung up the phone. Philip sighed, placed his phone on the nightstand, and got out of bed to get dressed. 

Everything had gone perfectly the night before with Theodosia. He was completely falling for her. He thought he had liked her before, but all it took was one date and he was completely gone. He was addicted to her smile. He thought of only her the whole subway ride.

~

Angie had been suspiciously quiet the whole rest of the way to the resturaunt, as well as when they sat down. A million thoughts seemed to be running through her head. Angelica tried to get her to talk, but she would only nod her head or shrug in response. 

Philip arrived a short while later in a complete daze. When Angelica asked him how his date went, he replied ‘great’, and then went back to thinking about the girl. He felt so incredibly lucky. Nothing could bring him down.

Angelica was incredibly grateful when Alex arrived. She was hoping that he would be able to relieve the odd tension. But, when Angie looked up at her father, she glared at him and that hope was lost.

At first, Alex didn’t notice. “Morning, sorry I’m late,” Alex said, placing a kiss on Angelica’s cheek and sitting down at the table.

“It’s no problem,” Angelica replied. She looked back over at her niece, who was intensely studying the menu like it was her job. 

“Ang, how’d it go last night?” Alex asked his daughter, still not picking up on her cues.

“Fine,” she replied sharply.

“Did something happen?” He asked again, giving a confused look to Angelica who didn’t have any answers for him.

“I don’t know, why don’t you ask the guy you slept with last night,” Angie snapped.

“Angelica Hamilton!” Angelica exclaimed. 

That certainly snapped Philip out of his own mind. “You slept with a guy last night?” Angelica passed Will his iPad and headphones to block him out of the conversation.

“What did you tell her?” Alex asked Angelica. Angie was stewing in anger.

“Nothing. I swear, Alex, I didn’t tell her anything.”

“Angie, honey, I didn’t sleep with anyone last night.” Angie scoweled and raised an eyebrow at him. She didn’t believe a word he said, and why should she? He had lied before; he could lie again.

“Don’t lie to me. Philip and I deserve more than your lies. I heard the shower in the background of your phone call.”

Alex was silent for a moment. He hadn’t wanted to tell his kids anything before it was serious. They had only been on one date, for god’s sake. “Angie, I didn’t sleep with anyone. I went on a date, that’s all.”

“Then you woke up in his apartment?” 

“Angie, I-”

“Mom’s only been gone for a year!” She shouted. Then grumbled, “I’ll see you at home.” Tears were falling down her face as she got up from the table and left. 

“I’ll go with her,” Philip said, gritting his teeth. 

“Philip-” Alex said, standing up to try to stop him.

“Not now,” he spit. Then, they were gone.

Alex put his head in his hands and groaned, “Shit.”

“You have smart kids,” Angelica stated. 

“Angelica, I really like him, but I think I’m gonna have to leave him, aren’t I? Clearly the kids aren’t okay with me dating again.”

“Don’t make any rash decisions. You’re going to need to talk to them when they calm down and see what the real issue is, because I don’t think it’s the fact that you went on a date.”

“What do you mean?” Alex asked. Angelica sighed. For such a smart man, he could really be oblivious sometimes. 

“The Reynolds Articles?”

“Shit.”

~

“Angie, wait up!” Philip called out, stopping her on the sidewalk. She wrapped her arms around him in response. “Fuck him.”

She let a few angry tears spill out. “Fuck him,” she repeated.

“Let’s go home.” He stated, dragging her along. Their subway ride was silent. They both needed to collect their thoughts before they said anything else. Their dad was seeing other people now. It seemed to come out of the blue.

When they got back to the apartment, Philip threw his house keys on the counter and Angie collapsed onto the couch. He paced in front of her. “What are we going to do?” He asked her, running his hand through his hair.

“What are we going to tell him?” Angie sighed.

“I don’t know.” He paused for a moment. “What bothers you about the whole thing?”

Her eyebrows knit together as she… pictured it. She remembered the look on her mother’s face when she read The Reynolds Articles. “Mom,” she stated simply, but with an edge to her voice. “And all the lies.”

“I want him to be happy,” Philip replied.

“Well, so do I. I just keep picturing him with that intern and everything that went down afterward and…”

“You don’t want him to be with anyone else except Mom?”

“Is that so bad?” She asked.

“No.” He said quickly. “I don’t exactly like it either.”

“Why didn’t he tell us?” 

“He probably didn’t want to hurt our feelings or wanted to wait.”

“If Mom were here, none of this would be happening.”

-  
Philip couldn’t help but remember the day the Reynolds Articles were released. His Dad had tipped the press off for as long as he could, but in the end he couldn’t take it. He let them release the story.

Their mom had Google notifications on for whenever their dad was mentioned in a new article. On that day, around four o’clock in the afternoon, Philip and Angie were sitting at the kitchen table, doing their homework, while Eliza was cooking dinner in the kitchen.

“Oh!” Eliza exclaimed, picking up her phone when it buzzed. “Your father is in another article!” It buzzed again. “And another.” She frowned. “And another.”

Out loud, she read to her kids the first headline. “George Washington’s Right Hand Man,” she paused. “Committing Adultery.” Both of her kid’s heads shot up and they placed their pencils down. They were young, but they were old enough to know what the word ‘adultery’ meant.

She read the rest of the article to herself. Philip and Angie studied their mother’s face as she read each article and watched how she began to fall into herself.

Knowing that she wouldn’t show them, Philip pulled out his phone and searched their father’s name. Together, he and Angie read the articles. Philip put an arm around his sister as she began to weep softly. They didn’t understand what was happening. Everything was changing.

When Alex walked through the door around 5:30, the room was silent. Nobody had said a word since they read the articles. Eliza looked up at Alex and whispered as calmly as she could, “Philip, Angie, I’m going to need you to go up to your rooms.”

They did as they were told. Philip brought Angie into his room, and together they sat by the door and listened to their parents downstairs. The yelling went on for hours. Eventually, Angie fell asleep on Philip’s shoulder because she just couldn’t listen anymore. Philip heard every haunting word.  
-

After going through it again in their minds, they both couldn’t believe their dad would lie to them about something like this again. They couldn’t wrap their minds around it.

Before they wanted him to, Alex walked through the door with Angelica and Will. He rushed over to them. “Angie, Philip, I’m so sorry.” By the look in his eyes, he seemed to be sincere. Angie didn’t care.

“I don’t trust you anymore,” she cried slightly. “I thought I could get over it but I can’t. You’re a cheater and a liar.” 

Alex couldn’t condemn her statements, and it killed him. “I love you, Angie. You’re my daughter. I only didn’t tell you both because I didn’t know if it was going to go anywhere.”

“You should have asked if we were okay with it,” Philip said, finally getting into the conversation.

“You’re right, I should have.”

“You shouldn’t have cheated on Mom,” he stated.

Alex sighed. “I know.”

“I told you that Angie was still hurting when it came to the Reynolds Articles. I told you that you needed to talk to her.”

“I know.” Then, he added, “I never meant to hurt either of you.”

Angie only had one more question. To her, it meant everything. “Are you going to see him again?”

“I won’t do anything you’re uncomfortable with, but you guys, I’m happy with him. I haven’t been this happy with a person in a long time.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Who do you sympathize with? Philip and Angie have super trust issues when it comes to their dad.. huh? But, Alex really likes John. Stay tuned to see what happens! If you leave a comment or kudos I'll love you forever <3
> 
> xoxo  
> Emily


	6. Begin Again

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> "She needs a mom," Alex sighed.  
> "No, she needs you," Angelica emphasized.

He was happy, he was happy. Her dad’s words rang in Angie’s ears. She wanted him to be happy, of course. It was a terrible thing to wish unhappiness on someone else. The only thing was, Angie wasn’t happy. She hadn’t been happy since they day her mother died. How was it possible that her Dad was able to be happy before her? Her Dad was in love with her Mom. At least, she thought he was.

“Do you still love Mom?” Angie asked, looking at the floor.

Philip crossed his arms and looked at his Dad expectantly. Alex was slightly shocked at his daughter’s question. It seemed obvious to him. “Of course I still love your mother,” he sighed. 

Angie slightly interrupted him at the end of his sentence. “Because if you don’t love Mom anymore that means you don’t love a part of me because everybody always said that I was more like Mom,” she rambled. 

“I still love your mother and I still love you,” Alex insisted. He then kissed his daughter’s temple to seal his words. Surprisingly, she let him do so.

“Angie, I think you’ve got a lot more of your father in you than you believe you do,” Angelica reminded her. “You certainly have his stuborness.” She received displeased looks from both her niece and brother in law. 

Philip had been suspiciously quiet. He knitted his eyebrows together. “You said his name was John?”

Alex looked up at Philip with a slight frown. “Yes,” he replied, though uneasy.

“As in, John Laurens? Our principal?” Damn, he was quick. Angie’s head shot up and waited expectantly for answer.

No more lies, Alex reminded himself. “Yes, your principal,” he replied hesitantly. Lord, he didn’t want to tell them that so soon.

Angie and Philip both pictured their principal, then their father, and then the two of them together. It didn’t make sense, but somehow it made perfect sense. That was the most difficult thing to understand. “I-I think I need to go to my room for a little while. To process and all.”   
With that, Angie gave a nod, got up, and left the room to go to her own. 

After a moment of silence, Alex pleaded to his son, “Philip, please, tell me what you’re thinking. You and Angie tend to be on the same wave length.”

Philip played with his hands and stared at them like there was nothing else he would rather be doing. He didn’t move his eyes when he spoke. “I think we’re scared of more change in our lives. Everything about you and Mr. Laurens makes sense.”

Alex’s eyes lit up a bit. “You do?”

“For some reason, it just clicks. I’m still I’m still uncomfortable, but somewhere along the way we all learn how to cope and how to live.”

Goodness, his son was smart. He always had something intelligent to say. This hadn’t gone well, by any means, but Alex certianly felt comforted by Philip’s words. “Thank you, Philip.” It was all he could say.

“I’m going to go upstairs and check on Angie,” Philip said. “Will, come on, time for your nap.” He took off the boy’s headphones and took his iPad.

“Aw, no! I don’t wanna,” He whined. 

“Will, do as your brother says,” Alex stated.

“Fine,” Will replied, dragging the word out. Philip, Angelica, and Alex all laughed in response to his childishness. He could be cute sometimes.

~

After putting Will down, Philip knocked softly on Angie’s door. “Ang?” He asked, half not expecting an answer. “Can I come in?”

“Is it just you?” She asked.

“Yeah, it’s just me,” he replied. 

“You can come in,” she finally said. When he walked in, she was sitting on her bed, on her phone, listening to soft music playing in the background; a sad song that he recognized from a new musical. She looked up at him for a moment, but her face was blank.

Philip went over to her and sat on the bed. She leaned her head on his shoulder and placed her phone down. “Is everything going to change?” She asked, suddenly becoming very small. 

“It might,” he admitted. Then, he placed and arm around her shoulder and added, “But, Angie, things with you and I are never going to change. You know that, right?”

“What happens when you go to college?”

“That’s not for almost a year,” he protested. “Even then, nothing is going to change. I’ll just be a phone call away.”

She nodded, but stayed in her position next to him. “I miss mom,” she said, seemingly for the thousandth time in the past two days.

“I know,” he replied with a sigh. “But who knows, this could be good for us.”

“Or good for him.”

~

“That was… interesting,” Angelica said, tapping her fingers on the counter. Alex stood on the other side, folding his arms and leaning on top of it. 

“This is so fucked up,” he groaned. 

“Yeah, when it comes to you, I tend to think that a lot,” Angelica replied.

“Hey, you encouraged me to go out with him!” He got up from the counter and ran his hands through his hair.

“I’m still encouraging it! I think you could’ve handled your children better when they figured it out, but that is what it is.” Then, getting one more dig in, she added, “Plus, you could’ve not cheated on your wife. That probably would have helped.” He glared at her.

“Can you just help me fix this?” He asked desperately. 

“Alex, honey, I’m sorry, but I think that only you can fix this. Your relationship with Angie is especially important now at this age. Philip, well, he’ll trust you through everything.”

“She needs a mom,” Alex grimaced.

“No, she needs you,” Angelica emphasized. Alex sighed; he knew she was right. Somehow, Angelica was always right.

~ 

After talking to Angelica, Alex called John. They had said they were going to go out again that night, but with everything that had happened, he didn’t think it was appropriate.

“Hey Alex,” John said. Suddenly, he didn’t have any air and no words came out of his mouth.   
“Alex?” John asked after an awkward pause.

Alex blinked. “S-Sorry,” he stuttered. “I mean, hey!” God, it was like he was fourteen again.

John laughed a bit. “What’s up, Alex?” 

Finally, he could actually talk like an actual adult. “Hey, listen, I’m really sorry, I know we were supposed to go out tonight but my kids found out about us and-”

“Your kids found out about us?” John asked, cutting him off. “How?”

“Angie heard the shower in the background of my phone call with her and started asking questions,” Alex sighed. “One thing led to another.”

“Oh, Alex, that makes things way more complicated. Your kids- I’ve got to see them at school tomorrow,” John said, a bit exasperated. 

“I know,” Alex said, sighing again. “This whole thing is very complicated, but I really like you, John.”

There was a pause on John’s end, but after a moment he said, “Alex I think we both need to decide what we want.”

It was Alex’s turn to pause. “John, what are you saying?”

“Exactly what I said. You and I both need to decide if we think this is worth it. Call me when you know one hundred percent, okay?” He waited for a response, but Alex didn’t give him one. “Alexander, I’m not mad.”

“I know,” he whispered. “I’ll call you.” Then, John clicked the call off and Alex sat on his bed, utterly speechless. It took a lot for Alexander Hamilton to be speechless.

~

Later that night, after giving Angie enough time to ‘process’, Alex knocked on her door. She responded with a small, ‘come in’, and he did. When he opened the door, he found Philip and Angie both sprawled out on Angie’s bed, watching a movie on her computer. They barely looked up when he walked in.

“What are you watching?” He asked, trying to lighten the mood.

“Goblet of Fire,” Philip replied plainly.

“Oh, that’s a good one,” he smiled, sitting on the corner of her bed and for a moment they just sat there, watching it together. 

Eventually, Angie paused the movie. “Was there something you wanted to talk to us about?”

“Well, yes,” Alex said hesitantly. “I talked to John tonight.”

“Oh?” Philip asked, knowing his sister wouldn’t reply.

“I’ll do whatever the two of you want. If you’re not comfortable with it, I won’t be with him. It’s as simple as that,” he said. “We don’t want to make your lives anymore complicated than they need to be.”

Philip glanced at Angie. They had spent the whole afternoon talking about this and they had finally come to a conclusion, not that it made it any easier. “We want you to be with Mr. Laurens,” Philip finally said. 

Alex looked to his daughter. “Angie, is this true?”

“Yes,” she said, though her voice was barely above a whisper. “We want you to be happy, Dad.”  
As Alex wrapped his daughter in a hug and he couldn’t help it when his eyes welled up with tears. His kids had grown up so much in the past year. If Eliza were alive, she would have been so proud of the two of them. Will had such great rolemodels. He couldn’t be more thankful.

“Thank you,” he replied, letting her go.

Surprisingly, Angie had been crying as well. She wiped her tears and laughed a bit. “Now, go get your man.” 

Alex smiled at the two of them and hopped up from the bed. Before he left, he heard her whisper, “That felt weird to say.” He let out a light laugh.

“Watch the kids?” Alex asked, whizzing by Angelica, grabbing his keys, wallet, and phone. 

“Whoa, whoa, where are you going?” She asked in return, raising an eyebrow.

“To tell John I want to be with him!” He exclaimed, placing his hands on his head in utter glee. "The kids, they’re okay with it!” 

“Really?” She asked, a grin forming on her face. “Go get ‘em tiger!”

As Alex left the building, he laughed and smiled more than he had in a very long time. It was his time to begin again.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Yes, I made this whole process incredibly angsty SUE ME. Also, I'm sorry it's taking me so long to update, college apps are killing me!!!  
> As usual, leave a comment or a kudos and I'll love you forever!
> 
> xoxo  
> Emily


	7. Relationships

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> "I think we're doing this."

Alex was incredibly full of glee until the moment that he was about to knock on John’s door. He was ready to burst through and tell him everything, but suddenly there was a crushing weight on his shoulders. What if John said no? What if it was all for nothing?

His smile fell a little bit as he knocked on the door and worry filled his mind. John looked surprise when he answered the door and saw Alex standing in its frame. “Alexander,” he said.

“I know that I said I would call,” Alex replied. “But I wanted to do this here.”

John looked at his feet for a moment, expecting the worst. “Come in,” he said quietly, stepping to the side to allow Alex to walk through. He watched Alex take his coat off and was sort of surprised to see him do so. He didn’t think this was going to take very long.

“I talked to the kids,” Alex breathed, trying to let out his nerves.

“Okay…” John said hesitantly.

“It was a long talk. There was a lot of unspoken feelings from the past that were brought up and it was really difficult,” Alex said running his hand through his hair. “I want to be honest with you. I’m tired of being dishonest.”

“That’s good,” John said, confused. 

“So I’m going to tell you why they were mad,” Alex began.

“Alex, you don’t have to-” John cut in.

“No, I really do.” He took a breath. “When I was married to Eliza, I had an affair with a woman named Maria Reynolds. It was released to the public because I couldn’t pay to have it hidden anymore and it was all over the news for a week. My kids were there when my wife found out, because I didn’t have a chance to tell her before the paparazzi did. My family went through hell because of the mistake I made.”

John opened his mouth as if he was going to say something, but Alex cut him off again. “I don’t want any secrets. I tried to keep you a secret from my kids and it made everything worse. They’re only just forgiving me for the affair.”

“A lot of things in my life are uncertain. My job with George Washington is gone as soon as he’s out of office. My kids are growing up and I don’t know how to raise them. I do know one thing for sure. I like you a lot. Maybe it’s love, I don’t know. My kids are okay with it. I want to do this with you.”

John leaned against the counter and sighed. “That was a lot to take in.”

“I know, and you can take all the time you want to process and all of that,” Alex insisted. “When you get me, you get all of me and I just needed you to know that.”

“I’m glad you told me, Alexander,” John replied, looking at his shoes. A million thoughts swam through his head as he tried to put everything together. He remembered reading the Reynold’s Articles. They were all over the news. He hadn’t put two and two together.

Alex swallowed. “It wasn’t easy, but I feel like there’s something here.”

John looked up at him. “I think we’re doing this.”

“We are?” 

“If you’re absolutely sure.”

“I’m sure.”

~

It had been such a long day that when Philip went to bed, he checked his phone for the first time since the morning. He had three missed texts from Theodosia. The first one said, ‘good morning’ with a little heart next to it. Philip smiled. The second one said ‘Philip?’ She sent it around twenty minutes after her first text. Then, the third one said ‘I’m sorry, did I do something?’ She sent that one two hours after and then hadn’t sent one since. 

“Fuck,” Philip muttered to himself as he hurriedly texted her back. ‘No!’ He sent. ‘I’m sorry, some stuff went on with my family and I couldn’t be on my phone.’ 

Thirty minutes went by and she still hadn’t texted him back. He couldn’t be mad, of course, after not replying to her for seven hours. However, that didn’t stop him from bursting through Angie’s door to get her advice.

“What does this mean,” He said, emphasizing the word ‘this’ and throwing his phone in her direction.

She picked the phone off her bed and read through the couple of messages. “Oh man you fucked up,” she told him.

“How could I have fucked up? I couldn’t be on my phone all day because I was comforting you!” Philip exclaimed, collapsing on Angie’s bed.

“Yeah, that’s fine! But what you sent her was such a line. If I read that, I would think the guy was lying to me just to cover something up. No wonder she hasn’t responded.”

Philip thought through her words. “Well, shit. What should I have done?”

“I don’t know, called her maybe?” Angie suggested.

“Think I can still do that?” He groaned, putting his hands over his eyes and completely lying down on her bed.

“It’s worth a shot,” Angie shrugged. She picked up her own phone and rapidly sent out a text. She had been doing so when he walked in too.

“Who are you texting?” Philip asked.

“You’re stalling,” Angie quickly replied.

Philip narrowed his eyes. “Who are you texting?” He asked again.

“Lay. Off,” she basically spit. Philip put up his hands as if to surrender and then picked up his phone to call Theodosia.

“I’m going to stay in here to call her, alright? So you can motion to me if I say something stupid?” Philip asked. Angie nodded, but inside she was surprised that her brother actually looked nervous. He was usually pretty smooth when it came to stuff like that.

The phone rang and rang for a seemingly endless period of time. He thought that she was going to let it go to voicemail, until on the very last ring Theodosia picked up.

“Hi,” she said in a small voice. Thanks to caller ID, she knew exactly whom it was that was calling her.

“Hey, listen, I’m really sorry about earlier. The family thing wasn’t just a line; it was a hundred percent true. My sister can even vouch for me-” Angie vigoriously shook her head. She did not want to get into the middle of that.

“No, no that’s okay,” Theodosia insisted. “I’m actually sort of glad it happened. I got to thinking about our relationship.” Philip held his breath. “I don’t know if this is a good idea, Philip.”

“What are you tryin’ to say?” Philip asked, biting his lip. Angie looked up from her phone.

“It has nothing to do with you not replying. Our parents hate each other. Do you really want to start that?”

“My dad would be okay with it if it was what we wanted,” Philip stated, thinking of the other events of the day. “We don’t have to tell them right away.”

“My father…” Theodosia said, trailing off. 

“Theo please don’t give up,” he begged. “I’ve waited for this for so long.”

“I’m not giving up Philip,” she said. She sounded like she was holding back tears.

“I’m coming over.”

“Philip, wait-“ 

“What?”

“Sneak up the side. There’s a tree.” Then, she hung up the phone. Angie looked at Philip with wide eyes, waiting for an explanation. 

“What’s wrong?” She asked.

“She’s worried about our parents.” Angie gave him a sad smile. She wasn’t really surprised. “Cover for me?”

“Always.”

“Love you.” Philip kissed her forehead and ran out the door. 

~

“This feels… wrong,” Angelica whispered as she lied in bed. “I’m always telling him to be truthful, yet here I lie with you, hiding the truth from him.” She had left the Hamilton house about two hours ago, leaving Philip to watch the kids. She wouldn’t have done that, but they didn’t have much time.

“Darling, you know what life would be like if he knew,” he breathed into her ear.

“I know, which is exactly why I haven’t told him,” she sighed, snuggling up against him. “I wish you didn’t have to leave so soon. Everything has been so crazy lately.”

“I wish I didn’t have to leave either, Ang. The only time I’m at peace is when I’m with you,” he replied, kissing the top of her head.

“So don’t go.”

“You know I have to. It’s an election year. We’re taking all the publicity we can get,” he sighed.

She looked up at him. “Just, come home as soon as you can, alright?”

“I’ll be on the first flight out.”

“I love you, Thomas.”

“I love you too, Ang.”

~

Alex came home with his heart full of love and his head full of thoughts. Seeing no one in the kitchen, he went up the stairs to Angie’s room and knocked on the door.   
“Where’s your aunt?” He asked.

She looked up from her phone and said, “She said she needed to run some errands and that you would be home soon.”

Alex had asked Angelica to watch the kids, so he was a bit confused. But, he was sure that she had a good reason for leaving. “Is your brother in his room?”

“My younger brother is asleep. You’re welcome,” she laughed. “Philip, being the idiot that he is, had to run over to a classmate’s house to borrow a text book to finish some homework.”

“He’s suspended tomorrow,” Alex stated, confused at why he would need to rush over to someone’s house for homework when he wasn’t even going to school the next day.

“Oh uh, I think he had to turn it in electronically. Yeah, that sounds right,” Angie stuttered.

“Okay,” Alex replied. He still wasn’t completely convinced but he would let it slide.

“How did it go with John?” Angie asked.

“Really well,” Alex smiled. “I’d tell you the details but…”

“That’s okay, I don’t really want to know,” Angie chuckled. “A bit too soon.”

“Agreed.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> okay I seriously need some comments on this chapter! hope you all enjoy! It's a bit shorter than the rest, but I'm revealing a lot :)
> 
> xoxo  
> Emily


	8. Fighting

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> "Anything and Everything."

Philip basically ran to Theodosia’s apartment. He had to take the subway, but even that wasn’t fast enough for him. His leg bounced in anticipation of the coming conversation. He thought of what he would say, but nothing seemed right. He needed to convince Theodosia that they were worth fighting for, even if it was difficult with their parents. That wasn’t going to be easy. They were only in high school, so their parent’s opinions meant everything. Philip and his father had a different dynamic than most, but he was sure that Theodosia and her dad were very close as well.

When he finally arrived at the apartment, Philip was completely out of breath. He saw the tree Philip had mentioned, but she hadn’t told him it was through the gate that led to her side yard. With a deep breath and a willingness to conquer anything for this girl, he climbed over the fence. For a second he had good balance, but then he lost it at the top and fell to the ground with a quick thud. He groaned as he lied on his back and moved his limbs to make sure nothing was broken. 

Luckily for him, nothing was. He was just incredibly sore. As carefully as he could, Philip stood up on his feet and stared at the tree in front of him. Theodosia’s room was only a story or so in the air, but falling from the top of that would hurt a lot more than falling off of the fence. 

Taking another deep breath, he grabbed the first limb and began to climb, all the while thinking about Theodosia, and how he was doing all of this for her. As careful as he was wth his footing, Philip finally made it to Theo’s window and knocked. She answered right away.

“Come in quickly,” she said with urgency. “And quietly.” Philip did his best, but he basically fell through the window. It wasn’t very graceful. 

“I’m sorry,” he apologized, brushing himself off and standing in front of her.

“No, no it’s okay. He’s probably asleep anyway,” she replied, glancing toward her door and folding her arms. Clearly, she was protecting her own feelings and was showing it by looking uncomfortable with the whole thing. “Besides, I’m sort of amazed that you’re even here.” A hint of a smile showed up on her face, but she quickly erased it. 

“I didn’t want that to be the end,” Philip said simply. “How could it end like that? We’ve barely even started.” He looked desperate. Still, Theodosia didn’t know what to say.

“Philip, this whole thing scares me. I was driven by my emotions before, but now that I have a clear head on my shoulders I can see that this isn’t going to end well.” She looked to the side. She couldn’t look him in the eye.

“Theo, we’ve been friends for so long and I finally got the courage to-”

“I know,” she cut in. “I shouldn’t have led you on. I’m sorry.”

“Don’t be sorry, Theo! Tell me that you’re willing to try this! I’m willing to fight for you; for us.” He finally caught her gaze and grabbed her hands, holding her so tight that she felt like it would be impossible to let him go. She didn’t want to let him go.

“I’ve never been fighter,” she whispered, shaking her head. Philip’s face fell as he realized the meaning behind her words. Her gaze fell to the floor once again.

“Theo…”

“But, then again, I’ve never had something worth fighting for.” She snapped her head up to look at him, almost as if she didn’t believe that those words had come out of her mouth either. Patiently, Philip waited for her to continue. “I’m afraid to just… jump in the water.”

“I’ll pull you in. I’d do anything, Theodosia.” She loved the way her name rolled off of his tongue. “But if you don’t want to do this, I’ll step back. I’ll forget this whole thing and we can go back to who we were before this was even a possibility.” He looked serious. She just looked scared. 

Her eyes moved frantically back and forth. She didn’t want that, not at all. “No!” She exclaimed. He raised an eyebrow. “I’m sorry, I-I’m just so afraid of letting him down.”

“Your father?” Philip asked. Seeing the look on her face, he knew the answer. He stepped toward her and held her tight. “Oh, okay, c’mere. Shh… I know it’s not going to be easy, but you and I? We can do anything.”

She smiled up at him through teary eyes. “And everything.”

‘Anything and everything’ was Philip and Theodosia’s always. They had been friends for long time. It hadn’t been a serious friendship. They joked back and forth during classes and in the halls. They met when they were freshman on orientation day. 

She was so small back then. She ran straight into Philip, her hands full of books. “Oh, I’m so sorry!” She exclaimed, her books falling all over the floor.

He leaned down to pick as many as he could up. She did so as well, getting on her knees to do so. “It’s okay,” he laughed. When they finally stood up, he stuck out his hand for her to shake. “Philip Hamilton.”

She returned it. “Theodosia Burr.”

“Burr… I’ve heard that name before,” he replied, but at the same time could not place it. They would come to realize who their parents were when they were sophomores. They kept their friendship a secret, as to not make things complicated at home. They used little white lies here and there.

She shrugged. She had never heard the name ‘Hamilton’ before. Her father wouldn’t start bringing up his work vendettas until she was a sophomore. There were many nights at dinner that she would have to suffer through his passive aggressive complaining about her best friend’s father.

“Can I walk you to class?” Philip asked, still holding her books in his hands. She blushed. “Where are you headed?”

She flipped over her planner to check her schedule. “World History,” she replied. “Though, I don’t quite know where that is…” She looked around, seemingly a bit nervous. 

“Oh, I have that to! I think it’s that way.” He seemed a bit unsure, but he still led her to the class with confidence that all Hamilton’s pride themselves on having.

They got in trouble for talking in class that day. Theodosia had never been yelled at in class before. It turned out they had a very similar schedule, because they were both taking the highest level of classes they could. It was a drive they had both inherited from their fathers. 

They both ended up staying after school and Philip began rambling. He told Theodosia all about his hopes and goals. He told her how he needed to step up and get into an Ivy League school. Theodosia shared his dreams and she was delighted to tell him that she wanted the exact same things.

“I have a feeling that, together, we could do anything,” he laughed.

She sighed. “And everything.” Then, she let out a little bit of a laugh.

“Anything and everything,” Philip repeated.

~

After realizing the time, Philip needed to rush home. Their goodbye kiss was one for the books. He and Theodosia decided that they would figure out what they wanted to do after a good night’s sleep. He did his best to get home at a decent hour, but by the time he got back home it was almost 11:30.

“Philip!” Alex exclaimed when he walked through the door. He had been sitting at the counter with Angie waiting for him to come home but he jumped out of his seat when Philip arrived. “Oh, thank god you’re home. Where have you been? I’ve been texting you non-stop!”

“He was this close to calling the cops,” Angie added, glaring in Philip’s direction. He wasn’t supposed to be gone that long. She had to talk her father out of doing anything irrational; especially because she knew where her brother was and that he was fine. She had tried sending him SOS texts, but he never responded.

“I’m sorry,” he said, pulling his phone out of his pocket. “My phone died. I guess I didn’t notice.” He looked to Angie; desperate for the explanation she had given their dad. “I didn’t mean to make you nervous. It just took a little longer than I thought.”

“Where’s the textbook?” Alex asked. 

“What?” Philip replied. Angie, standing behind Alex, used her hands to motion for him to go with it. “Oh, the textbook! I- I ended up doing the homework at my friend’s apartment.” Angie sighed out of relief. He caught on.

“Then where’s your homework?” Alex pressed, thoroughly unconvinced. 

“I left it at my friend’s house. He’s going to turn it in for me tomorrow because I’m suspended, remember?” The lie came out of Philip’s mouth so easily that Angie almost believed it herself. It made her wonder what other things he had lied about.

“Trust me, I remember,” Alex muttered, eyeing his son. “Get up to bed you two. It’s been one hell of a day.”

Angie followed her brother up the steps quickly and quietly, waiting to explode on the boy until they got inside his room. She was so mad that her face flushed a bright red color.

“I can’t believe you!” She shouted after she closed the door behind her. “Do you know how difficult it was to cover for you? You were gone for hours, Philip!”

“I know, and I’m super grateful for you Ang,” he said with an apologetic smile. No matter how hard he tried, he couldn’t wipe the grin off his face. “I definitely owe you one.”

“You’re fucking right you owe me one,” she said with an edge to her voice. He looked surprised at her use of language. Then, she sighed and asked, “Was it worth it?”

“Totally worth it Angie,” he sighed happily, collapsing on his bed. “We’re together. Like, really together. We’re going to figure it out.” The anger disappeared from her face as she saw how utterly happy her brother was. It was hard to be mad at the bastard.

Instead of being all loving like she wanted to be, Angie kept on her rock hard face and replied, “You’re disgusting.” He looked hurt, and even though she knew it was fake, she couldn’t help but crack a small smile and a laugh.

“Disgusting but in love,” he concluded. Then, Angie’s cell phone beeped. She pulled it out of her pocket, smiled, and began to reply as she walked out the door. Philip stopped her. “Hey wait!”

“Hm?” She asked, pausing in the doorway and not even really paying attention to him.

“Who the hell have you been texting all night?”

“None of your business.” With that, she was gone.

~

“Thomas,” Angelica moaned into the man’s ear. He responded with a slight groan. The two of them were pressed up against each other, no space between them. The sheets were tangled around their bodies. They had one final night before he was gone for the week. A week was a long time in their world. 

You could have cut the passion in the air with a knife. The only thing that could possibly stop them was – Angelica’s phone began to ring – a phone call from Alex. 

She sighed. “Don’t answer it,” he whispered with a bit of pain in his voice. He didn’t want them to stop. She didn’t want them to stop either, but it didn’t matter what she wanted.

“I have to,” she replied. With a bit of hesitation she rolled over, sat up, and pressed her phone to her ear. Thomas rolled onto his back and folded his hands on his chest, waiting for his love to be done. “Hello?”

“Angelica, thank god, is Philip with you?” He sounded nervous and on the edge of collapse.

“No…” Angelica replied. “Why, what’s going on? I’m not at my apartment right now.” 

“He’s been gone for hours and I can’t reach him. Will you let me know if you hear from him? Or, maybe, could you go check at your apartment to see if he’s there?” 

Angelica gave a sideways glance to Thomas. “I can’t exactly leave right now…” Thomas looked at her curiously and moved his position up to his elbows.

“Where are you?” He asked. Angelica rolled her eyes.

“I’m out, Alex. I’m sure Philip is fine; he’s old enough now to know what to do. I’ll let you know if I hear from him. Don’t freak out too much, okay? If he’s not home by one, call me, then call the police.” Now Thomas was incredibly interested. Alex muttered some sort of concession, then Angelica said, “Alright, talk to you later. Goodnight.”

“What was that?” Thomas asked, intrigued.

“Alex duty,” she laughed. Then, more seriously she said, “Philip hasn’t come home yet and he’s freaking out.” She seemed sort of nervous herself. It was justified, considering they lived in New York City. Maybe she should have gone to help, but in all honesty, what was two more hours going to do?

“Ah,” Thomas replied with an understanding nod, bringing her close to him. “You really care about those kids, don’t you?”

“Like they were my own,” she stated. Suddenly, she began to worry even more. “Eliza would be so mad if she saw me lying her, forfeiting going to look for her eldest.”

“Hey, don’t think like that…”

“I should go,” she quickly decided.

“Do you want me to come with you, darling?” He asked, concern in his voice. 

“Our relationship is still a secret, Thomas. I’m not prepared to tell them tonight, especially if something really is wrong.”

“Alright, love.” He kissed her forehead. “I’ll see you in a week.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> To make up for my lack of posting :) As always, drop a comment or a kudos and I'll love you forever!
> 
> xoxo  
> Emily


	9. Moving Up

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> "You're mine, Angelica Hamilton."

On Monday morning, Philip’s alarm blared but he pushed the button it off right away. He was suspended, so it wasn’t like he needed to get up at the crack of dawn. His father, on the other hand, had a different plan.

“Philip!” He called out banging on the door. Philip groaned and didn’t answer him, so Alex burst through his door and repeated himself. “Philip!” He put the covers over his head. “Oh no you don’t. You’re getting up just like it’s a normal school day,” Alex said, shaking him.

“Dad, it’s totally ridiculous that I’m even suspended!” Philip argued.

“You’re getting up, doing your schoolwork, and then you can do what you want,” Alex stated. “Up and at ‘em!” He left the room and closed the door behind him.

He might’ve fallen back to sleep if his phone didn’t buzz with a text message from Theodosia. It read: ‘Good morning! I’m going to miss you at school today’ with a little heart next to it.

He smiled and replied, ‘I’m going to miss you too. Come over after school?’

‘If I can come up with an excuse to give my father, I’ll be there,’ she replied right away. Then, ‘Will your dad be home?’

‘Not until after dinner. He always works late.’ 

‘Then I’ll see you soon,’ he texted back with a little smiley face next to it. He was certainly awake now. Once he started thinking about Theodosia, he couldn’t stop.

~

Angie woke up with a smile on her face as well. She had a good morning text on her phone and, because her brother wasn’t going to be at school, she could finally act on it today.

‘I can’t wait to see you too,’ she replied. It took her forever to get dressed. Everything had to be perfect today, because it might have been the only chance they would get for awhile to be together. 

“Angie!” Alex called up the stairs. “Let’s go! You’re going to be late!” Angie put in her second earring and then quickly ran down the stairs with her bag slung over her shoulder. At that point, Philip and Will were already at the counter eating while Alex was standing behind it sipping coffee. 

Alex went wide-eyed when he saw her. “You look nice,” he said, confused. Angie was wearing a dress. Angie didn’t wear dresses ever. Philip narrowed his eyes. 

“Who are you trying to impress? The guy you’ve been texting?” He asked.

“I’ve been texting a friend,” Angie said with an edge to her voice, sitting next to him at the counter. “I’m not trying to impress anyone. I just felt like dressing nice. Is that a problem?”

“No,” Philip muttered.

“Will, Ang, we should probably head out,” Alex said eventually after a slightly awkward bit of silence, pouring his coffee into a to- go cup. “Philip, don’t leave the house today and make sure you get all of your work done.”

“Yeah, yeah,” Philip mumbled. Angie squeezed his shoulder before they all walked out the door.

~

Angelica woke up with a pleasant sigh and reached over to the other side of the bed to be closer to Thomas, except all she could feel were the sheets of the bed. She opened her eyes to look at his side and found it to be empty, the sheets pushed to the side from where he used to be. 

She sat up and wiped her eyes, seeing a note on her bedside table. It smelled like him. “My love, I’m sorry I had to leave so early in the morning, but I didn’t want to wake you after last night. I’ll see you as soon as I can. I love you, Thomas.” 

She smiled at the note. Thomas had been so good to her. Last night she went out to Alex’s house to only find all three kids and Alex asleep in bed. They didn’t even hear her come in, so she left without a sound. If she were Eliza, she might’ve stayed until the morning, but Eliza was always the better sister.

Thomas waited at the house for her to come back. He was up until two in the morning even though he had a 6 AM flight the next morning. He wanted to make sure that everything was absolutely okay before he fell asleep. He wanted to fall asleep when she was in his arms. Nobody had ever done that for her before, except for maybe Alex. But that was a different kind of love. At least, it had to be a different kind of love.

It was killing her that she hadn’t told Alex about Thomas. There were so many reasons she felt she couldn’t tell him. Thomas and Alex were enemies in the workplace. They were constantly pulling George in different directions, but put on a nice face in the press. George kept the both of them to keep himself grounded.

She needed to be in Alex’s life, whether he thought so or not. She couldn’t afford for him to be mad at her. Those kids needed more than Alex. They needed her even though he might never admit it.

She also just couldn’t tell Alex. It was as simple as that. There was something that might have been a million years ago. The feelings were gone. They had to be. But still, it didn’t feel right. He was with John now. She was with Thomas. Why did she feel so guilty?

~

Around noon that day, Alex was doing work in his office with a smile on his face. He hadn’t stopped since the moment he walked in the door. Burr came in every so often to annoy him with new reports and proposals, but he continued to shoo him out. He was behind on all of his work and that killed him.

Eventually Aaron came into his office with something less annoying. “Alex, George wants to see you.” Alex nodded and pushed past Aaron. “Alex?” He said, stopping him. “I lost my wife too a few years ago. If you ever need anything-”

“I’m fine Aaron,” Alex said sharply. Then, in a softer tone he said, “But thank you,” and swiftly turned around to go see George. He was happy. He didn’t want to talk about his dead wife anymore, especially with Aaron. 

Alex knocked on the door and then entered. “George? You wanted to see me?” He was always a little bit smaller around George. He was the one person who could keep him in check.

“Alex, come in,” he said. He sat down at one of the chairs in front of George’s desk. “How are you doing?” That wasn’t what Alex expected to come out of his mouth.

“I’m fine, sir, but really, I have work to do,” Alex said quickly. 

“I know what work you have to do, Alex. I wanted to see how you’re doing because I have a question to ask you. So, how are you really?” He asked with a slightly stern voice.

Alex sighed. “I’m actually great, sir. I started dating this guy and, well, I think he’s one that’s going to stick around.” He blushed slightly, thinking about John.

A smile appeared on George’s face. “That’s fantastic Alexander,” he said, and then paused for a moment. “Alex, I have something very important to ask you. Before you respond, I want you to make sure you’re ready.”

Alex nodded, “Yes, of course.”

“Alex I’m going to run for President and I’d like you to be my campaign manager.”

Alex looked at him in surprise. “Really sir?” He asked, glee in his voice. 

“Yes, Alexander,” he said with a smile. 

“Yes, sir, I’d love to do that. This is such an honor,” Alex rambled, slightly out of breath and not quite sure what to say. 

George dismissed the word ‘honor’. “There’s a press release tomorrow. I’ll be running as a democrat, of course. Send all of your remaining work to Aaron and start working on my opening statement.”

“Yes sir!” Alex jumped up and basically ran out the door.

~

“Finally,” Angie breathed as he pushed her up against a locker and kissed her. “I have been waiting for this for so long.” She looked up at the ceiling and he went down to kiss her neck. After a few moments of pleasure, he looked into your eyes.

“You’re finally mine,” he smiled.

“I always have been,” she said, diving in for another kiss. 

“I want to tell people about us,” he said after they pulled away. “I don’t want you to be my dirty little secret anymore.”

“My father’s going to kill me,” she sighed as he went in to kiss her neck again, trying to convince her. “My brother’s going to kill you.”

“I’m not afraid of your brother,” he said with a smile. “I love you.”

She blushed. He was always making her blush. His words were so sweet. They had only been together three months, but it was the most meaningful relationship she had ever had. “I love you too,” she said eventually. It wasn’t the first time they had exchanged those words.

Their relationship consisted of video chats, late night phone calls, and secret meet ups after school that they only managed once or twice a month. She’d heard him whisper more than she’d actually heard him speak. Sometimes he’d get angry, but it was nothing they couldn’t handle. She loved him.

“It’s time to tell them,” he insisted, cradling her face with his hands. “I want to be able to do this all the time. I want to be able to hold your hand in the hallway and show everyone that you’re mine. That way, no idiot can flirt with you in the courtyard again.”

She ran a hand through his hair while he put his arms around her waist. “We talked about that. You know it meant nothing to me.”

“I know that now, but we can’t have it happen again. You’re mine, Angelica Hamilton. The whole world deserves to know how much I love you.”

She looked up at him with love. There were bad moments sometimes, but that made the good moments even better. It took a lot of coaxing for him to understand what had happened in the courtyard Friday, which was why she had been texting him all weekend. She didn’t want to lose him over something stupid. “Okay, I’ll tell them,” she conceded with a smile. “I’ll call you as soon as I do.”

~

“This is perfect,” Theodosia whispered. She was wrapped up in a blanket, snuggled into Philip, watching a movie and drinking hot chocolate. They had spent the entire afternoon together, and it had been littered with kisses and hugs. For the first time, they got to express how they felt about one another. Every kiss felt like a firework went off inside of them.

“I couldn’t agree more,” Philip whispered into her ear. 

“But, I have to go,” she said, starting to take the blanket off, but Philip pulled her back into him.  
“Do you really have to right now?” He whined slightly.

“You know I do. I have to be home before my father gets there and yours gets here,” she sighed, getting up from the couch. He followed suit and wrapped her into a hug.

“Luckily they’re never around,” Philip replied. 

“We’ll tell them someday, but for now we just have to wait,” she said over his shoulder.   
“Goodnight, Philip Hamilton.”

“Goodnight, Theodosia Burr.” She smiled, put on her coat, and then she was gone. 

Alex came in the door not much later. He put his brief case down on the table and then went into the family room to talk to Philip who was watching television. “Did you get your work done today?” He asked.

“Yes, Dad,” he said, rolling his eyes.

“Where are your brother and sister?”

“They’re upstairs,” he replied simply. Alex grabbed the TV remote and clicked it off. “Hey!”

“Angie! Will! Come down here! I have big news!” Alex exclaimed. 

Philip raised an eyebrow. “Big news?”

Alex didn’t say anything until the other two kids were downstairs. He motioned for them to sit down. “What’s going on?” Angie asked.

“George Washington is going to run for President,” Alex said quickly. “He wants me to be his campaign manager.” 

Angie squealed. “Oh my gosh, Dad that’s fantastic!” 

“So proud of you Pops!” Philip exclaimed. 

“Yay Daddy!” Will said, running over to him and jumping up into his lap. Alex squeezed him tight.

“Thanks buddy,” he replied.

Angie looked around and saw how incredibly happy everyone was and decided to take the opportunity to tell them her news. She hoped the good vibes would help the anger that might come. “I-I actually have some news too.” 

“Oh?” Alex asked, bouncing Will on his knee as he laughed. 

Angie took a breath before saying, “I’m dating someone. He’s really sweet, kind, and wonderful-”

“Who is it?” Philip cut in.

“Now, before I tell you, let me just say that-”

“Who is it?” Philip asked again, narrowing his eyes. 

“Peter Jefferson,” Angie sighed, looking at the two of them worriedly.

“Oh, you’ve got to be fucking kidding me!” Philip yelled angrily, standing up and beginning to pace.

“Philip Hamilton! Language!” Alex shouted at him. “Will, why don’t you go upstairs and play? We’ll have dinner soon, okay buddy?” Will ran upstairs without a word. He knew to leave when his brother started to yell.

“I’m sorry Pa, but Peter Jefferson? Thomas Jefferson’s son? He’s a total jackass! He’s going to take advantage of her!”

“No he is not!” Angie spit. “He’s wonderful to me! Don’t be a hypocrite Philip!” Luckily, in the heat of the moment, Alex didn’t understand the meaning behind her words about being a hypocrite.

“Alright you two, let’s not get worked up.” He turned to Philip. “Angie is allowed to date whoever she wants, even if I’m not exactly thrilled about his last name.”

“But Pops-“

“No buts. It’s okay, Angie. Though, I’d like to meet him sometime soon,” he said with a slight smile. “I trust you to make good choices.”

Angie smiled. “Thanks, Dad.”

Through gritted teeth, Philip said, “I don’t like it and I’m never going to like it. You don’t have my approval.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So... I should tell you that the next chapter couple chapters are going to be rough. You have been warned. Love you all! Drop a comment or a kudos and I'll love you forever :)
> 
> xoxo  
> Emily


	10. Files

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> "Philip, I'm scared."

A few months later, things were a lot different in the Hamilton household. John Laurens was a regular in their kitchen. He would come over after school and start making dinner, taking phone calls in between. Alex’s face lit up whenever he walked in the door and saw him standing at the stove in an apron, stirring something that smelled delicious. Everyday, he walked over to him and planted a kiss on his cheek, his stress immediately melting away from the day. 

Alex was doing amazing at his job as campaign manager for George Washington. They were in the midst of primary season and George was already ahead in the polls. They liked his ‘father figure’ attitude and his warm smile. He always had a calm, collected response to any negative press. Alex was the one who exploded when needed. In fact, the Saturday night before somebody had protrayed him on Saturday Night Live. Everyone laughed their asses off for days. It was the perfect sketch.

At work, the tensions between Alex and Thomas Jefferson were getting a bit more intense. Thomas believed that he deserved the job that Alex received. He was still an instrumental part of George’s campaign, a close advisor, but he wasn’t the campain manager. He didn’t get all the glory. Their fights were getting louder, but luckily they hadn’t become public yet.

Angelica’s relationship with Thomas was still a secret. When she found out her niece was with his son, she couldn’t justify telling anyone. The high schoolers would break up eventually and that was when they would tell her family. The secret felt dirty and it was starting to eat Angelica alive. But, there was nothing she could do. 

Not only was Alex fighting with Thomas, he was dealing with a brooding Aaron Burr. Aaron felt like he was demoted. At this point, he was basically Alex’s assistant. He always had been, but before their was more responsibility attatched to that position. He felt as if someday Alex would recommend him for a better job. That didn’t seem to be happening. In fact, Alex was complaining about Burr even more than normal. He said that Aaron didn’t have a backbone and was always trying to sensor his speeches.

Everyday that her father came home and complained about Mr. Hamilton, Theodosia became more afraid to tell him about her relationship with his son. Philip wasn’t exactly thrilled about the idea either, especially after he made such a fuss about Angie being with a Jefferson. So, they continued to sneak around, but the guilt weighed heavily on their minds.

Angie Hamilton was still with Peter Jefferson. Her brother fought long and hard to keep them apart, but she fought against him equally has hard. Eventually, he let her be. About a month ago, they had a huge fight. She thought it wasn’t fixable. They were at his house when it happened. He screamed, yelled, and threw things while she apologized through tears. When she came home, there were cuts on her hands from a glass that he broke and bruises on her arm from when he grabbed her in a moment of passion.

When she came home, Angie was a mess. Philip heard her crying from the next room over, even though she tried to muffle it. Her dad was already asleep. John was staying over. So, Philip took it upon himself to check on her. She cried and cried but she wouldn’t tell him what was wrong.

“Angie, does this have something to do with Peter?” He asked worriedly, holding her to his chest. She didn’t respond. She just cried, because Peter loved her. This didn’t mean anything. He sighed, knowing that he wasn’t going to get an answer out of her. 

Angie’s hand was awkwardly placed behind her, so Philip went to move it onto his lap, noticing the cuts for the first time. “Oh god, Angie! You’re bleeding! C’mere.” He stood her up and brought her to the bathroom, cleaning the wounds and placing bandages on them.

After an hour or so of Philip staying with her and Angie still not saying a word, she finally choked out, “Not a word of this to Dad, John, or Angelica.”

Philip frowned. Now that they had three parent-like figures, she had to specify that he couldn’t say anything to any of them. “Angie, I can’t promise that,” he sighed.

Her tears became angry. “You have to. Not a word, Philip Hamilton.” She became frantic, her eyes wandering, thinking about Peter. “O-Or I’ll tell them about Theodosia.”

Suddenly, Philip didn’t recognize his sister anymore. This was a side of her he had never seen. He knew it was Peter that was having the effect on her. She was in love with him, and he was scared for her. He put her to bed with a quiet promise, because he knew that he couldn’t give up his love either.

The next morning, Angie acted as if nothing happened. Philip tried to talk to her about it, but she denied all of his attempts. When she got to school, Peter apologized and kissed her in a way he never had before. Angie told him that he was willing to look past all of it. She would do anything for him. 

~

On Wednesday, March 23rd 2016, everything seemed normal. It had been a few weeks since Angie’s incident with Peter and Alex was so involved with his love life and his job that he was a bit blind to the things that were going on. He wasn’t around much, but when he was, he was with John. 

As they did everyday, Angie and Philip walked Will to school, and then went on their own way to the high school. They made light conversation, but everything had been a bit tense since that night in her room. Angie tried to keep her head up and forget what had happened. Peter had been a lot sweeter to her after it happened. She kept telling herself that he loved her.   
There was one class that Angie, Peter, Theodosia, and Philip had together, and that was journalism. They wrote articles every week and critiqued each other, and they also put out a paper once a week. They all had a passion for it. 

Angie was standing with Peter when her phone buzzed four times in a row. “Who’s texting you so much?” He asked her, leaning over to look at her phone. Angie pressed her home button and saw the name ‘Lafayette’ on her screen.

“Oh, it’s just a kid from my French class,” she replied non-chalantly. 

“Let me see,” he said, taking her phone and scrolling through it. He typed something out and then handed it back to her for her to read. It basically told the boy to ‘back off of his girl’.

“Peter, you shouldn’t have done that,” Angie sighed. “I love you, not him. You don’t have to be worried.”

He grabbed onto her arm and she winced. It was a tighter grab than she was used to. “You’re mine, Angelica Hamilton,” he said with a more serious face. He said that all the time, but for the first time in a few weeks, she was afraid of his words. Her eyes widened and she tried to move away from him, but he wouldn’t let her go.

While he was standing with Theodosia, Philip saw his sister out of the corner of his eye. He watched her try to shake away from her boyfriend. Then, he saw the scared look in her eye. “Get away from her!” He screamed, running over to them and pushing Peter off of her.

Angie stood behind him. For once, she wasn’t going to stand in her brother’s way. Peter was getting worse. Peter had an insane look in his eye. He was about to fight back when a shot rang out somewhere in the school.

~

“Everybody to the corner of the room!” The teacher yelled. Then, he checked for students outside the door before quickly locking it and turning off the lights in the classroom. “Stay quiet!”

John Laurens, the principal, came over the announcements and said, “The school is on lock down. This is not a drill.” Then, it clicked off and he was gone.

Philip grabbed Angie’s hand and brought her to the other side of the room from Peter. Theodosia followed. “Philip,” she whispered through tears. “I’m scared.”

“It’s okay, Angie,” Theodosia whispered in a soothing voice. “We’re safe in here. It’s going to be okay.” However, she didn’t quite believe her own words. She felt that, because she was older, she needed to be calm for all of the underclassmen in the room. In reality, whoever had that gun could come in that room in any moment.

Philip began to take action. “We’re going to call Dad, okay?” Angie nodded, tears streaming down her face. The phone rang a few times, but the line was busy. They couldn’t reach him. “We’ll try again in a few minutes,” he assured her.

“Angie,” Peter whispered from across the room. “Angie, I’m sorry.” 

“Mr. Jefferson, now is not the time,” the teacher scolded him. “Silence, please.” He looked just as afraid as the rest of them. Peter stewed in anger. He didn’t look afraid at all. 

There was ten minutes of deafening silence, except for whimpering here and there, before there was a banging on the door. Angie gasped and cried into Philip’s chest. He put his arm around her and gripped Theodosia’s hand with the other.

The banging continued until suddenly, the door burst open. Two men, both armed, walked into the room and flicked the lights up, screaming, “Everybody up! Now!” They all did as they were told, standing in fear. “Who in here is a Hamilton?” Angie’s eyes widened even farther and Philip held her close to him, gripping onto her for dear life. Theodosia held his hand as if she never planned on letting go. They demanded an answer. “Tell us or we start shooting!” They screamed.

Philip raised a shaky hand, letting go of his sister. “No!” Angie screamed, then put her hand over mouth. She shouldn’t have done that. 

“Is this your sister?” They asked. Philip could’ve sworn he saw a smile behind their masks. When he didn’t say anything, they took it as a yes. They ripped Angie from Philip’s arms while she screamed.

“No! Don’t take her! Take me!” He screamed, but Theodosia held him back. 

“We’re not going to hurt her,” they assured him. Yet, at the same time, they had Angie down on her knees, her hands behind her back, and guns in their hands. She was sobbing quietly at this point, unable to even manage any sound. “Your Daddy just needs to give us what we want.”

“I don’t know what you’re talking about!” Philip screamed, and then ran forward to his sister. The man who had been speaking knocked him back with the bunt of his gun. He fell back hard. 

“Call him! Call your father!” He demanded. Philip scrambled to his feet and pulled his phone out of his pocket, praying that his father would pick up this time. 

He put the phone on speaker and the man snatched from his hand. Alex picked up on the first ring. “Philip? Are you with Angie? Are you okay?” He said quickly, his voice panicked and frantic.   
“Alexander Hamilton, you have made a big mistake.”

“What are you doing with my kids?” He screamed.

“You have a file. You know the one we’re talking about. The one you’re not supposed to have.”

“I don’t know what you’re talking-”

“Yes! You do!” He screamed in response. Then, in a more diplomatic voice, he said, “Either you give us the file or your children get shot. The girl is first. You have a half an hour.” Then, he hung up the phone.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So, that just happened. Just you wait everybody. John, Alex, and Angelica's perspective next. It's a hell of a ride folks. Drop a comment or a kudos and I'll love you forever!
> 
> xoxo  
> Emily


	11. The Other Side

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> "They're ours, John."

Wednesday, March 23rd was supposed to be a normal day, but it couldn’t be from the moment that a shot rang out in the halls of the high school. John Laurens was sitting in his office when he heard it. He immediately jumped out of his chair and ran to his secretary’s desk and said over the announcements, “The school is on lock down. This is not a drill,” as calmly as he could possibly manage.

His secretary, Jane, had already called 911 and they set off the emergency system in the school. The two of them were able to quickly get outside because of the proximity of the office to one of the entrances of the school. Law inforcement told John that he couldn’t evacuate any of the students until they were aware of what was happening inside. 

“I’m sorry, Mr. Laurens, but any one of those kids could be hiding a gun in their jacket. Once we figure out where the threat is coming from, we’ll have a better idea of when we can get the kids out of the school.”

“You don’t understand! My kids are in there!” He almost corrected himself, but it didn’t matter right in that moment whether Philip and Angie were his kids or not. He wanted them out of there. 

“Mr. Laurens, we’re tapping into the security feed right now to try to assess the situation. We’ll let you know when we can get them out as soon as we can.” With that, the man walked away. 

The district was busy sending out messages to the parents to inform them of the situation, but John decided to make a personal call to Alex. He needed him here now more than ever.

~

“Burr, how many times did I tell you that I needed that report by one o’clock today?” Alex yelled, slamming his papers down on the desk. It had been an insane morning. The press had been all over his ass about rising tensions between a large company and George’s campaign.

“Hamilton you told me once among the multiple other things that needed to be finished today. It slipped through. I’ll get it done by the end of today,” Burr snipped. Everyone was on edge that day.

“Now, Aaron, I needed it now!” He ran his hands through his hair in frustration as his phone began to ring with John’s name on the screen. “I need to take a phone call. Just, get out of my office,” he said through gritted teeth. Aaron turned on one foot and left while biting his tongue.

“Hey John,” Alex sighed. “Listen, I’m really swamped here. I don’t have much time-”

“Alex, a gun went off in school. Someone has a gun. The kids are on lock down inside-”

“What?” Alex asked with urgency, cutting him off. He didn’t hear the beep of the incoming call from his kids. All he could hear was white noise.

“You should really come down here, Alex. I don’t know what’s going to happen. I need you. Our- your- kids need you,” John insisted. 

“I’ll be there as fast as I can,” Alex replied, completely stunned. “It’s going to be okay, John. We’ll get them out of there.”

“Hurry, Alex.”

Alex hung up the phone and stuffed it into his back pocket, not even bothering to pack up his things before he ran out of his office and into George’s. He didn’t notice the notification of a missed call from his son.

“There’s been a shooting at the school,” he said, completely out of breath. “I have to go.”

George stood up and motioned for him to go. “Take care of your kids, Alex. Call me if you need me, alright?” Alex barely heard the end of his sentence, as he was already halfway out the door.

~

On Alex’s way to the school, Angelica called him in a panic. She received the automatic message from the school and told him that she would be down there right away, and that she was bringing someone. When he asked who it was, she didn’t answer, but he didn’t care. It didn’t matter who she brought. He needed her.

John was pacing on the school grounds when Alex arrived. His Vice Principal was taking care of most of the questions from parents because John couldn’t really function. It had been ten minutes and law enforcement still had nothing to tell them.

Alex ran up to John and wrapped him in a hug, squeezing him tighter than normal. His tie was loose around his neck and his long hair hung around his shoulders even though it was usually up in a tight ponytail. It fell out when Alex was on the way to the school, and he didn’t bother to fix it.

“Has anything changed?” Alex asked, looking up at John with a bit of hope behind his eyes. When John shook his head and said no, it was shattered. 

Suddenly, Alex’s sadness turned to rage as he ran up to the chief and yelled, “What’s going on in there? You have to get my kids out!” John grabbed Alex’s arm to hold him back from physically getting up in the man’s face.

“Sir, we’re doing the very best we can. The kids are our number one priority. Whoever is in the school hacked our system under our noses. We’re trying to get into the feed,” the man said as calmly as he could. 

“Go in there. Get them out,” Alex replied through gritted teeth. 

“We’re doing what’s best for the entirety of the student body, Mr. Hamilton.” Alex walked away in anger, thinking that they weren’t doing enough to save his kids. He was about to grab a gun and go in there himself.

Then, his anger turned to sadness as Alex fell apart into John’s shoulder and sobbed, “I can’t lose them too, John. First Eliza and now- I can’t lose them.”

John held the back of Alex’s head against his chest and rested his chin on top of it. “You’re not going to lose our-” he corrected himself, “your- kids, Alex. I promise.”

Alex broke away from John’s chest and looked up into the man’s eyes. “They’re ours, John,” he stated.

“Alex…” John trailed off. “I didn’t mean to pressure you.”

“You’re not pressuring me, John,” he insisted. “After today, they’re ours. If anything happens to them, they’re not just mine. They’re ours. They’re going to need you as much as they need me.” John smiled and pulled Alex back into him. It was a small ray of light surrounded by a tragedy.

Angelica arrived a minute or so later with Thomas Jefferson by her side. Alex wanted to yell, he wanted to scream at her for not telling him, but he couldn’t. He was just thankful that she was there. Every time he looked at her, he saw Eliza. Now more than ever, they needed the spirit of Eliza.

“Mr. Laurens! We got connection to one of the security cameras. One of the cameras to one of the classrooms was left untouched.” Alex, Angelica, Thomas and John ran over to the man’s side and looked at the screen. They saw their children cowered in a corner, scared for their lives.

“There they are!” Alex exclaimed, putting a hand over his mouth and gripping John’s with the other. “God, they look so scared,” he whispered.

“My boy,” Thomas whispered. 

“We’re going to get those kids out of there,” Angelica said with a determined look in her eye.  
Then, they watched as two huge men with guns burst through the door. This wasn’t a troubled kid going on a rampage. These were adults on a mission. The chief walked away from the scene, yelling orders at his troops, preparing to enter the school and take out the threat.

“Do you have audio?” John asked at an incredibly loud volume. The man in front of the computer typed out a few controls and after a few seconds they were able to hear every word.

“Who in here is a Hamilton?” They heard the man scream. Alex’s eyes were glued to the screen. All around them, men were preparing to enter the building, but what happened next caused them to pause and rethink their actions.

“Come on, loves, don’t give up. Don’t give in,” Alex whispered. John gripped him tight, wondering why on Earth they would be looking for their kids. They watched Philip raise a shaky hand. “Fuck, Philip! This isn’t the time to be brave!” 

Immediately they heard Angie scream, “No!” Alex began cursing under his breath as they ripped his daughter from her brother’s arms.

“Alex, why do they want your kids?” Angelica asked, completely horrified. Everyone around them was thinking the exact same thing.

Alex didn’t answer because he watched his daughter be forced down onto her knees with a gun to her head. They said they weren’t going to hurt her, but that was clearly a bold faced lie. Then, they started talking about Alexander himself. They said that they wanted something from him. Alex’s eyes widened as he realized to what he was referring.

When Philip called him, he picked up on the first ring. “Phillip? Angie? Are you okay?” He knew perfectly well that they weren’t, but it was the only thing he could say in such a panic.

“Alexander Hamilton, you have made a big mistake,” the man stated. A lump formed in Alex’s throat. He was going to feign innocence for as long as he could.

“What are you doing with my kids?” Alex screamed. John held onto Alex’s shoulder. Angelica and Thomas stood on his other side, their arms linked together in fear. They wanted their kids back.

“You have a file. You know the one we’re talking about. The one you’re not supposed to have,” The man stated. 

Alex didn’t even think before he replied, “I don’t know what you’re talking-”

“Yes! You do!” The man interjected with a scream, staring at the phone. Alex looked up at the screen and saw the intensity in the shooter’s eyes. He looked crazy. He was working for someone that caused him more fear than the armed forces outside. “Either you give us the file or your children get shot. The girl is first. You have a half an hour.”

Alex tried to reply, but the phone was clicked off and there was nothing. Alex crouched down onto his knees and began to let out choked sobs.

“Mr. Laurens, we can’t enter the school. There’s a high risk of the shooter firing on Mr. Hamilton’s daughter, son, and possibly others.” John was only half listening to the police chief. He was staring at his Alexander, thinking of his children. He gave the man a slight nod.

“Alexander, what file is he talking about,” Thomas Jefferson said through gritted teeth. He knew that if they couldn’t get to Hamilton, his son would be next. His son was all he had besides Angelica.

“The Davidson File,” Alex said between his sobs. Thomas put his hands on his head and ran them through his hair. The Davidson file was full of secrets within the banking community in the United States. They were going to use it to improve the financial system for the people. It was top secret. George had promised him that nobody knew that they had acquired it.

“I’m calling George,” Thomas quickly replied, stepping away from the scene. Alex looked up to watch the screen again. He saw his daughter shaking in fear, still down on her knees and his son being restrained by a girl he recognized to be the daughter of Aaron Burr. They all had tears in their eyes.

“Alexander, can you hear me?” George said over the speakerphone. “Alexander I’m on my way, can you hear me?” He repeated.

“Yes, sir, I can hear you. We’re giving them anything they want,” Alex demanded. “We’re giving them the file.”

“Alexander, we can’t do that. There’s a way we can get out of this-” George said as calmly as possible.

“No! We’re not risking my children’s lives, George!” Alexander screamed, his throat raw. There was a pause over the phone.

“With all due respect sir, my son is in there as well. Aaron’s too. For once Alexander and I are on the same page. We need to send them this file,” Thomas said in distress.

“You’ll lose your jobs,” George said. “I’ll lose mine.” 

“Send it,” Alexander said immediately. “There’s more to life than this campaign, George.”

With that, the George hung up the phone and called their team and ordered them to send the file to the company that the shooters worked for. When the man with the gun received the call, he let the children out of the room and the men themselves were immediately seized by the police.

“Dad!” Angie screamed, running to him. Philip was close behind.

“My love,” Alex replied softly. He cupped her face and wiped the tears from her eyes. She looked at him with so much love, he just couldn’t stand it, even though it was his fault she was in that room in the first place.

Philip went straight to John. As John wrapped his arms around him, his whole body relaxed. They were out of that room. His sister was safe. Theodosia was safe. He shook as John held him. Still, all he could see was the barrel of that gun. “Shh… It’s okay. You’re safe now,” John whispered into his hair.

As both children pulled away from their hugs, they looked to each other and all four of them came together and just held one another. Nobody wanted to let go ever again. Angelica came over to them after a moment and they just stayed there, together. 

Thomas was holding his son. Aaron was holding his daughter. Too many secrets had been revealed in such a little amount of time.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Drop a comment or a kudos and I'll love you forever! 
> 
> xoxo  
> Emily


	12. The Aftermath

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> "We cannot allow ourselves to become a tragedy."

“I want security for my kids wherever they go if this is to continue. I am not going to put my kids in danger for a job.” Alexander Hamilton sat across from George Washington as he spoke very plainly. His hair was a mess, not pulled back like it usually was. He was wearing a tie, but it was loose around his neck. He wasn’t wearing a suit jacket. He didn’t bother. They weren’t going to make him do any press confrences the day after the attack.

The country was a mess. George was going down in the polls after releasing the bank’s best-kept secrets to a company that already had too much power in the country. Luckily, they hadn’t released the file to the public, but everyone knew George Washington had let go of something confidential.

They only had a few more primary elections left before George cinched the nomination. They were important elections, however. Some people were withdrawing their votes, but others were saying that the way George acted was admirable in the face of a family crisis. 

“I don’t know, Alexander.” His face looked tired. He had barely slept in the past twenty-four hours. Alex wasn’t any different. The tensions were high and their whole campaign was on edge.

“You have constant security! Why shouldn’t my family have security?” He talked with his hands when he was angry. He was trying not to yell, but it was so difficult. Only twenty-four hours ago, he watched a gun be placed to his daughter’s head because of the job that he had. That was enough to make anybody want to yell. “Either you get security for my family or I walk. You know that without me as your campaign manager that this campaign is done.”

He was playing hardball, something he never had to do before with George. George threw up his hands. “Alright, Alex, you’re getting security by tomorrow, okay? You’re a vital part of this campaign, Alexander.”

Alex relaxed in his seat. “Thank you, sir.”

“I’ll need your family to do an interview tomorrow with CNN. They want to talk to the family that the whole world is holding their breath waiting to hear from.” Alex furrowed his eyebrows. As a campaign manager, he knew the interview would help the election on Tuesday. As a father, he was concerned to put his children through something like that only days after the attack.

He ran a hand through his hair. “I don’t know, George. My kids have been through a lot.”

“Alexander, you know I love your kids and you very much, but if you and I both want to keep our jobs, we’ve gotta do everything we can to keep this train moving.”

“I know.” It was all he could say. He stood up and ran a hand through his a hair again. It was a nervous tick; a habit he had never broken. He grabbed his bag and coat but George stopped him.

“Will you do the interview, Alexander?” 

He looked up at him with a look of exhaustion and then said, “Yes.”

As he walked out the door, George said, “9 AM tomorrow.”

~

The kids had the next few days off of school. That’s what happens in the face of a tradgedy. People are allowed to lie in bed and grieve until they’re ready to face the world. John had to go to school for a few hours in the morning, just like how Alex had to go to work. He had to set up counseling for the kids, but the superintendent let him go after taking one look in his eyes after a few hours of work.

John walked through the door exhausted and emotionally drained. He was staying with Alexander and his kids. He offered to go home and let them be together as a family, but they all insisted he stay. The kids didn’t want either Alex or John out of their sight.

The house was silent, except for Will in the living room watching TV on a low volume. John ruffled his hair. “Hey buddy, have you seen your brother or sister yet this morning?” It was already noon. He tried to smile when Will looked up at him.

“No, when Daddy left he said to let them sleep,” Will replied. “We’re having a pajama day instead of going to school.” John knew that must have been the easiest way for Alex to explain the day to his son. He didn’t blame him. How could you tell that boy’s innocent eyes what that man had done to his siblings?

“Sounds like fun,” John said with a light smile, then climbed the stairs to go check on the Angie and Philip. He went to Philip’s door first. With a soft knock, he said, “Philip? Are you awake?”

He heard him say a quiet ‘yes’, and then he went inside to find Philip seated in his bed with a book on his lap, but he was looking straight ahead at the wall, his eyes glazed over. He didn’t even look over to John when he came in. 

Carefully, John sat next to him on the bed. “Did you sleep?” He asked, looking at the boy with worry. Angie had come into he and Alex’s room at two in the morning the night before, breathing heavily. With tears in her eyes, she explained that she ‘just needed to see them and make sure that they were okay’. 

Philip shook his head. “I’d fall asleep and then wake up twenty minutes later because someone was shot in my dreams. Eventually I stopped trying.” 

John nodded. He understood; both he and Alex had jolted upright due to nightmares. “Have you talked to Theodosia?” Through the mess of everything the day before, Philip confessed to his relationship with the girl. He didn’t know if Theodosia had done the same, so Philip had asked them to keep it quiet for her sake.

“I called her, but she said she couldn’t talk. She said she would call back when she was ready, whatever that means,” Philip replied with a bit of an edge to his voice.

“She probably just needs time-” He tried to reason.

“Well what if we don’t have time! Clearly, some guy can just walk in with a gun and end everything for you right now, or a cab driver can slip up once and kill you on the spot and you can’t do anything about it!” His face became red with anger as he looked at John in desperation. “Maybe time is the one thing that we don’t have.”

John took a breath. To lose hope was one thing, but to lose it at that age was something completely different. To realize how inevitable death is and to come in such close proximity to at the age of seventeen is something that Philip Hamilton never deserved to live through. 

“Then this is your chance to make something out of the time that you do have,” John replied with sincerity. “It’s alright to be scared, Philip, but don’t live your life in fear of things ending. That will ruin you.”

The boy looked at John for a moment, but then quietly said, “I think I’m going to take a walk.” He grabbed his coat and slammed the door of the apartment behind him without another word. He wasn’t mad at John, not in the slightest. He was mad at the world for being so goddamn complicated. 

Alexander came into the apartment a few minutes later. John was making coffee, stalling and waiting for Alex to get home before he talked to Angie. She hadn’t left her room at all that day, even through all of the commotion with Philip. 

John slid Alexander a cup. “You look like you need it,” he said, looking at the bags under the man’s eyes and the slight grimace on his face. “How’d it go with George?”

“We’re getting security starting tomorrow.” John smiled.

“That’s good, right?” The look on Alex’s face said it wasn’t, but security was what they were looking for.

“George wants the family to be interviewed tomorrow morning.” The smile was wiped off of his face. “All of us will be on CNN tomorrow, whether we like it or not.”

“Alexander I don’t think that’s a good idea,” John said lightly, thinking about the mess of a boy he had spoken with only moments ago.

“Well it’s either that or I lose my job,” Alexander snapped. There was a moment of tension before he said, “I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to get angry, I just don’t know what I’m supposed to be doing right now.” He took a sip of coffee and leaned against the counter on the palms of his hands.

“No one does, Alexander. We’re all going to keep pushing through. That’s what we do. If we need to do the interview, then we’ll do it. Nobody is going to argue with that.” John said everything as if it was simple, even though it wasn’t. 

“They’ve always had to ‘push through’. I don’t want to make them do that anymore,” Alex replied, motioning upstairs to the kid’s bedrooms. “For god’s sake it’s only been a little more than a year.”

John was silent. He didn’t pretend to know their grief over Eliza. He never knew her. He did know, however, that it wasn’t fair to have your mother ripped away from you as a teenager. He thought the kids were handling everything remarkably well. “Lead by example, Alexander,” he said, placing a hand on his shoulder. “If we fall apart, then so will they.”

“Do we not deserve to fall apart?”

“It’s not about what we deserve, it’s about what we need to do to get through this. Alex, we cannot allow ourselves to become a tradgedy.” The news would do that for them.

~

When Alex knocked on Angie’s door, it moved slightly because it was open just a crack. He hadn’t been expecting that. Angie’s door was almost never open. She liked to keep some parts of her life private, and the closed door was a symbol of that. Instead of waiting, Alex decided to walk right through. 

The light was still off. Angie was underneath the covers of her bed but she wasn’t asleep. Her eyes were wide open. When her father and John walked into the room, she jumped up in fear and her eyes became panicked. She watched them for a moment, as if she had to take a second to recognize who they were. 

“Angie, honey, it’s okay. We’re here,” Alex said in a comforting voice, walking over to his daughter carefully. “You're safe,” he insisted.

Still, she looked antsy and uncomfortable. “Where is Philip?” She asked quickly. Looking between the two of them rapidly. “Where is he?” She asked again when they did not give her an answer fast enough.

“He’s out for a walk,” John said soothingly, taking a seat next to her on the bed while Alex went on her other side.

“No, no! They’re going to get him!” She grabbed Alex’s arm in a panic. “Daddy, you can’t let him out there alone! They’re going to get him!” 

“Sweetheart, it’s okay,” Alex said, looking into her eyes. “They’re not coming back.”

“No!” She screamed again. Alex looked to John for some sort of guidance. John was just as stunned as he was, but he wrapped the girl up into his strong arms while she wailed. “He’s dead! They’ve killed him!”

John tried to quiet her. “Shh, shh… It’s alright, I’ve got you.” She continued to cry; muttering that her brother was dead, that he was gone and that they had shot him.  
In a moment of brilliance, Alex pulled out his phone and dialed Philip’s number. Quickly, he explained to the boy what was happening and then held the phone out to Angie’s ear. “Hey, Angie, can you hear me?” He asked calmly.

For a moment, her tears stopped. “Philip?” She asked.

“Yeah, Angie, it’s me. I’m alright.”

She took a shaky breath and then said, “Come home, Philip. Please, come home!” The volume of her words rose at the end in a panic for her older brother. 

“I’m on my way. It’s okay, Angie. You need to breathe for me, okay? I’m safe. I’ll see you soon.” He continued to talk to her, but the words were drowned out in Angie’s ears. She wouldn’t hear anything until he was standing in front of her without the bullet in his head like she had pictured.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> In real life, Angelica Hamilton went crazy after her brother died in a duel. This is my version of that, except Philip is still alive because I love him (and you). We'll be hearing from the Jeffersons and the Burrs next. Also, the Hamiltons will be interviewed by CNN. Drop a comment or a kudos and I'll love you forever
> 
> xoxo  
> Emily


	13. Jefferson, Burr, Hamilton, and Everything in Between

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> "We all just need some time."

“We’re not doing the interview,” John said, pacing the kitchen.

“John, you don’t understand. We have to do this interview,” Alex replied running a hand through his hair.

“Did you not just see our daughter up there?” He asked with an intense tone, motioning to the bedrooms upstair. “Our son is currently consoling her because she thought he was dead, Alexander. Just because he left the house.”

“I know what I saw,” Alex snapped. “What am I supposed to do, John?”

There was a moment of silence while the two of them stood across from one another, the kitchen island between them, just staring at each other. “Angie isn’t doing the interview,” John decided.

“But Philip is?” Alex asked.

“I think he’ll be able to handle it. If we explain everything to him, he’ll understand why he needs to do it.” Alex nodded, clenching his fists trying to deal with the insanity of it all. He didn’t want to subject his family to any of it, but he had to. He had a responsibility to the public to get George elected. If this interview pushed that into motion, then they would do it, no matter how painful it was.

~

Upstairs, Philip was reading a book to Angie on her bed. He knew she wasn’t really listening, but her presence simply comforted him in the way that Philip’s comforted Angie. They were safe and they were alive. That was all that mattered.

“Philip,” Angie said, interrupting his reading. “I’m sorry for earlier, I don’t know what’s gotten into me. I keep seeing that man…” She trailed off, her eyes moving frantically.

Philip studied his sister for a moment. “It’s okay, Angie. I understand.”

“I’m also sorry if I do it again. I-I don’t think I can control it.” She fiddled with her hands as she spoke to him. She constantly looked like a nervous wreck, but who could blame her?

“You never have to apologize to me,” Philip assured her.

“Could you get Mom for me? I want to talk to her.” Philip stared at her, his mouth open slightly as he tried to form words to reply with. Of course it came as a bit of a shock, considering their mother had been dead for over a year.

“Angie, Mom’s not here,” he said slowly, careful not to use the word ‘dead’. 

Angie furrowed her eyebrows and asked, “Well, where is she?” It was like she truly didn’t know.

Luckily, Philip was saved by a knock on the door downstairs. “Angie, uh, I’m going to go see who’s here, alright? I’m staying home, though, so you don’t have to worry.” He rushed out the door and ran down the stairs, eager to tell his father what had just happened.

“Pops!” He yelled, but was stopped by the people at the door. Both the Burr and Jefferson families had come over to their house, completely announced. His Aunt Angelica was standing at Thomas’s side, something that he still barely knew anything about.

“Philip, say hi to our guests,” Alex said to his son, his facial expressions just as confused as Philip’s. 

Philip stood slightly behind Alex and John as he politely said ‘hello’. In reality, he wanted to run up to Theodosia and just hold her there forever, but he couldn’t because he didn’t know whether or not her father knew about the two of them yet. 

“Hamilton, we’re here to talk about the interview,” Thomas stated, a displeased look plastered on his face. Aaron had the same look of disdain. It was clear neither of them wanted to be there. 

“What interview?” Philip asked.

Saving the moment, John said, “Philip, why don’t you take Peter and Theodosia upstairs while we talk about a few things.” 

Philip looked at John suspiciously, but then did what he was told. Peter and Theodosia followed closely behind him as he climbed the stairs and brought the two of them into his room. 

“Where’s Angie?” Peter asked immediately. 

Philip narrowed his eyes in Peter’s direction. “It doesn’t matter, because you’re not seeing her.” Theodosia sat on Philip’s bed, her hands folded in her lap, looking around at the contents of his room. She had never seen it before. Philip took a seat next to her and placed a hand on top of hers.

“Philip, I know Angie and I fought before everything that happened, but come on, dude,” Peter said with a sigh. He looked defeated, and Philip was pretty sure he had never seen him look that way. “She’s my girlfriend?”

“Is she?” Philip asked, starting to get heated. “Because Theodosia is my girlfriend, but I’ve never left bruises on her arms or cuts on her hands from glass.” 

Theodosia raised an eyebrow at him. He had never told her about the night that Angie came home crying after her fight with Peter. He had hoped it would never happen again, so he kept it to himself. “She forgave me for that. It was an accident,” he quipped.

“She looked terrified of you in the journalism room!” Philip threw back at him. 

“You didn’t hear the conversation, Hamilton!”

“Whether I heard it or not isn’t the issue. You’re not seeing her. She’s not in a good position right now,” he said with an edge to his voice. However, after thinking about his sister for a moment, his face softened.

Picking up on his body language, Theodosia asked, “What’s going on with Angie?”

“Everything hit her really hard. I don’t know how to explain it. She’s just, paranoid, I guess.” Everything he said was to Theodosia mostly, but then he specifically said to Peter, “She doesn’t need anything else on her plate right now.”

“It’s only been a day,” Theodosia replied with a light smile. “We all just need some time.” Philip nodded, hoping that she was right, then placed an arm around her waist.

Peter looked at them and frowned. “I miss my girlfriend. I need her right now. No one else understands what happened in that room better than her.” 

For a moment, Philip was able to sympathize with him. He kissed Theodosia’s cheek and she smiled, soaking in the support she knew she might only have for a few minutes. “I’m sorry, Peter, it’s just not a good idea.” Peter folded his arms and leaned against Philip’s dresser.

“So, we should probably talk about the interview, right?” Theodosia asked hesitantly.

“What interview?” Philip asked for the second time.

“You really don’t know?” Peter scoffed.

Theodosia glared at him. “CNN has asked our families to do an interview for them for a special on the attack. They want all of us.”

“Are we doing it?” Philip asked, looking to Theodosia.

“That’s why we’re here, Hamilton. Nobody has decided what they’re doing,” Peter said sharply. “I, for one, think we should do it.” There was a flash on arrogance in his voice, as if no other opinion could be correct.

“I don’t know,” Theodosia said hesitantly. “They have video footage of the attack that they want to show. I don’t know if I want to go through that again so soon.”

Philip pressed a kiss to the top of her head. “What happens if we don’t do the interview?”

“George Washington loses the election,” Peter stated simply. Theodosia glared at him.  
“You’re being over dramatic,” she sighed. 

“No! I’m not! Mr. Washington is dropping in the polls and if he loses the election, our parents lose their jobs. If we do this interview, Washington becomes a hero who let go of that file for the good of four high schoolers who were in grave danger.”

“He’s probably right, unfortunately,” Philip said with a downcast look. 

“Philip I haven’t told my father about us yet. We’re on that video,” she said, revealing her true fears. Philip bit his lip. There was no getting out of that one. Any reporter with eyes could see their body language meant they were more than just friends.

“Theo, we’re going to have to tell him then. We can’t let our relationship get in front of our parent’s careers, can we?” He was asking her, but they both knew that he was right. She sighed, but let him lead her downstairs. Peter followed behind like a lost puppy.

~

“So you two were asked to do the interview too?” Alex asked after bringing them to the living room and offering them drinks. Everyone sat on the couches stiffly. Even Angelica looked uncomfortable, which was new for her. Their apartment was basically her home as well.

“Why else would we be here,” Jefferson sighed, wanting to lean back, but Angelica held him up by placing a hand firmly on his back. His natural instinct was to act like this was nothing, but it wasn’t. The interview was a big deal.

“Alex and I decided that we were going to do it for the sake of the campaign,” John explained calmly.

“With your kids?” Aaron asked. That was the question of the night. 

“We were going to ask Philip to, but Angie isn’t emotionally there yet,” Alex replied, careful with his phrasing. 

“They have footage of the attack. I have a slight feeling that this is going to be more than an interview. They’ve got a hook,” Jefferson stated. John and Alex haven’t even thought about the idea of the media spinning the story in a different direction.

“If we don’t do this interview, everything could be over for George,” Alex said. “Which means that we lose our jobs too.”

“So what do we do?” Aaron asked, clasping his hands together and leaning forward, resting his elbows on his knees.

“Angelica?” Alex asked. 

She perked up. Alex had always asked her for advice in the past, but when John started to become more serious in his life, he didn’t need her as much anymore. She didn’t mind. She started spending more time with Thomas and was enjoying every second of it. Still, she missed her family.

“I think you three need to do the interview, but you need to let your kids decide if they want to take part. Their stability for the rest of their lives might be dependent on how we handle the next couple of weeks.” As always, she was right. 

“I don’t think Theodosia will do it. She seemed against the idea when we spoke about it this morning,” Aaron sighed. He didn’t blame her, of course, he just wish he had a support system next to him like he knew the rest of the men would.

“Well, maybe if Philip does it, she will,” John shrugged. He didn’t know the girl very well, but he knew that he would do anything for his boyfriend. He assumed most people were the same.

“What do you mean?” Aaron asked, sitting up straighter.

“I would say he has quite the influence over her,” Alex chuckled slightly. It was right then that Theodosia, Philip, and Peter appeared at the top of the stairs. Hearing the last few words of the conversation, Theodosia ran ahead of Philip and rushed down the stairs to her father.

“Dad!” Theodosia exclaimed. “I can explain.”

Philip, Alex, and John’s faces went white. Clearly, Philip had left out a few things when he told them he and Theodosia were dating. Aaron stood up. “Yes, I sure hope you can.”

“Philip and I are together,” she said, trying to organize her thoughts. Aaron raised an eyebrow, waiting for more of an explanation. She sighed. “Yeah, that’s all I’ve got. I’m sorry I didn’t tell you.”

“Theodosia, I am very disappointed in you,” Aaron replied, sitting back down. 

She stood there in shock, expecting more than just that. Her father didn’t look pleased, but he didn’t say anything else, so she went to go stand by Philip again. “That went well,” Philip whispered.

“No, it didn’t,” she whispered back. “This is what he gets like when he’s really angry. He’ll be passive and unbearable towards me.” Philip shot her a sympathetic glance and then gripped her hand.

“Kids, your fathers, as you know, are doing an interview with CNN, but they’re letting you choose whether or not you want to be a part of it as well,” Angelica explained.

“We’re not even going to ask Angie,” John insisted to Philip.

“Well I will certainly be doing it,” Peter replied. Thomas smiled.

“Me too. I’m there,” Philip added. 

Theodosia looked at her father nervously and looked at Philip. She didn’t know what the right answer was, because she didn’t know her father’s opinion. After a moment of contemplation, she said quietly, “I’ll do it as well.”

“9 AM tomorrow,” Alex said quietly.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A little bit of a filler chapter before the interview. As always, drop a comment or kudos and I'll love you forever (especially if you comment. god I love those)
> 
> xoxo  
> Emily


	14. The Interview

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> "Welcome to CNN."

The morning of the interview was pratically silent in ever household that was getting ready to part take in it. Alex woke up to an alarm wrapped up in John’s arms. Even as it blared, the two of them stayed in their place and John squeezed him a bit tighter. Eventually, Alex turned and kissed the man, and then quickly sat up and turned it off. 

John closed his eyes again. “Are we really doing this?” He mumbled, still lying in bed. 

“John, I really need your support here,” Alex replied quietly, pulling his shirt off to change. John nodded and sat up slowly, watching Alex as he flipped through his shirts in the closet. When he picked one out, he turned to John and raised an eyebrow. “You’re staring.”

“Can’t help it,” John smirked. Alex rolled his eyes and threw on his shirt. Any other morning, he might have complied, but this morning was different. This morning he could only think of his children and the terrible thing that happened to them.

Seeing the serious look on Alex’s face, John got out of bed and began to get changed as well. His usual trick of trying to lighten the mood wouldn’t work on a day like today. Silently, Alex clipped on his watch and went out the door before John even had the right pants on. 

Philip was sitting in the kitchen with a cup of coffee when he walked out. He was staring at it with an intense focus, barely even noticing when his father came in. 

“Thank you for getting ready,” Alex said, pouring himself a cup as well.

Philip gripped his cup a bit tighter. “I slept on Angie’s floor last night. She had a nightmare.”

Alex looked at Philip sympathetically and said, “You should have come and gotten me. I would have taken care of her.” He had a feeling this wasn’t going to be something that only happened every once in awhile.

Philip finally looked up at him. “It’s not you she wants, Dad. It’s me. All of her nightmares are about losing me.” 

Alex ran both of his hands over his face and then through his hair, opening his mouth to respond when John arrived. Immediately noticing the tension in the air, he said, “What’s going on?”

“Angelica had a nightmare last night and Philip had to sleep on her floor,” Alex explained, leaning forward onto the counter with his coffee cup in both of his hands. John sighed and leaned his back against the other counter.

“It’s getting worse,” he grimaced. “She can’t even make it through the night.” 

“We’ll look into getting help for her as soon as we get home from this damn interview.” Alex spoke softly until he talked about the interview, and then his voice became bitter and angry.

“We’re going to be okay,” John said, reaching for both Philip and Alex’s eyes. When he caught both of their gazes, he repeated, “We’re all going to be okay.”

Their silence was met with a scream from upstairs. “Philip!” Angie’s voice was raw with fear. All three men rushed up the stairs to help her.

~

Angelica woke up in Thomas’s arms. As their alarm rang, she couldn’t help but sigh and find comfort in the stability of his embrace. The day wasn’t going to be easy for any of the people that she loved. It took all she had to coax her boyfriend out of bed.

“Thomas,” she whispered. “Come on babe, we’ve gotta get up.” She propped herself up on one arm and twisted herself around to face him. He slowly blinked his eyes open and smiled when he saw her.

“Anything for you,” he replied warmly, as if he had forgotten what the morning would bring.

“If it were for me, we’d still be asleep,” she laughed slightly. He frowned, realizing what she was referring to, and then wrapped his arm around her waist and brought her in closer to him, allowing her head to rest on his shoulder.

“Thank you for being here,” he whispered.

“Where else would I be except with you?” She smiled slightly, pulling away a bit to look him in the eye.

“With Alex,” he replied simply. She bit her lip and nodded.

“I’ll be with him soon. For now, I’m here with you.” On the inside, she felt immensely guilty. Alex had told her before she left with Thomas what was really going on with her niece. Afterwards, he insisted that she didn’t need to stay the night with them and that Angie had a lot of support between him, John, and Philip. She reluctantly agreed and went home with Thomas. She should have stayed anyway, no matter what Alex said and how nice sleeping with Thomas felt. She had a duty to her sister that she had been slacking off on.

“Thank you, love,” Thomas replied, kissing her forehead. 

She rolled her eyes at the flirting and pushed him slightly. “Go get dressed.” 

It wasn’t long before the two of them were in the kitchen, grabbing cereal and fruit for breakfast, giving each other kisses as they passed each other in the kitchen. Peter came trodding down the stairs around fifteen minutes later. 

“Morning, kid,” Thomas said lightly. Peter grunted something that sounded like ‘good morning’ and then sat down and at his cereal without another word. Angelica raised an eyebrow and nudged Thomas, coaxing him to say something. “Are you alright, Peter?”

“I’m thinking about Angie,” Peter mumbled. Angelica cocked her head to the side. She had no idea what was going on between Angie and Peter. Last she had heard, the two were still dating.

“Is something going on between the two of you?” Angelica asked, not waiting for Thomas to be inquisitive. 

Peter glared at her. “We fought before the shooting and I haven’t seen her since.” Angelica shut her mouth. She was not about to tell the boy what was happening with her niece. It wasn’t her place, especially if there was a possibility that they were still dating.

“I’m sorry about that, son,” Thomas replied, producing a loud clap on his son’s back. 

“We’ll be fine,” Peter mumbled.

~

Aaron woke up alone. At the sound of his alarm, he immediately ripped off his sheets and sat at the edge of his bed, hunched over. He looked over to his bedside table and stared at the picture of he and his late wife, unable to look away. 

She had always been the positive one and the strong one that kept the family together when things went wrong. Every day, he looked at her picture to give him half of the tenacity she posessed. Even on a morning like this one, she would have had something funny to say to make him smile and laugh.

Normally, he would go to his daughter when he missed his wife because she was so much like her, but this morning he didn’t even have that. She lied to him for months and he was unbelievably angry about it. She was all he had and she couldn’t see that at all. Losing her terrified the shit out of him. 

Suddenly, he broke away from staring at the picture and began to get dressed. He couldn’t look at her for too long. It hurt too much.

When he went into the kitchen, Theodosia was standing at the stove, cooking breakfast. She put some eggs and toast on a plate and placed it on the table in front of her father, kissing his cheek. “Good morning, Daddy,” she said with the most cheerful voice she could muster up.

“Good morning,” Aaron replied stifly. 

Theo’s face fell. She turned around to get her own breakfast, trying not to cry as she sat across from her father at the table, silently eating. She hated to admit it, but her father’s approval meant everything to her. After they came home from the Hamilton’s, he barely spoke a word to her all night. It was torture.

After about five minutes of pure silence, she pleaded, “Daddy, please talk to me.”

“Theodosia Burr, I am nothing if I am not civil,” her father replied with an uninterested tone.

“Father, we are always civil!” Theo yelled through gritted teeth. “We never fight, we never yell!”

“Theodosia!” Aaron commanded, slamming his hand down on the table. “Do not raise your voice at me!”

Theo did not comply. “I’m sorry, Daddy, but we need to talk about this! You can’t just ignore me. I’m your only daughter. Your only real family!”

Aaron was silent for a beat. “Go to the car, Theodosia,” he said calmly.

“Dad-”

“Go to the car.”

~

“Welcome to CNN. The families behind the political campaign of George Washington who the nation has been watching for the past two days after shooters came into the schools of their children, looking for a specific, classified document. The document was released and the release of the children in the school followed. The nation is completely divided on the subject. Some believe it was right to do for the sake of the children, others are criticizing George Washington for releasing something so sensetive.” The interviewer paused for dramatic emphasis.

“I’m here with Alexander Hamilton, George Washington’s campaign manager, his significant other John Laurens, his son Philip, Thomas Jefferson, his son Peter, and Aaron Burr and his daughter Theodosia. Thank you for coming.”

“Thank you for having us,” Alex replied politely. 

Angelica and Angie sat on the side of the broadcast, unable to be seen by the camera. They needed to make sure that Angie had a good view of her brother, but was also being watched.   
They left Will at home with a babysitter. Everyone had been offering to do favors for them lately. 

“Now, each of you work for George Washington, except for you, John Laurens, who is the principal of the school?” The interviewer asked, even though it was very clear that she knew the answer.

“Yes, that’s correct,” John replied.

“Can you run through the events of that day at the school for me?” John began to tell the story with ease, doing his best not to put too much of the emotion into it. If he described how he felt, he knew that he wouldn’t be able to handle it.

“My next question is for the kids. How did the three of you feel in that room? Can you describe to me the atmosphere of that room?” 

Philip was the first one to speak. He clasped his hand together and said quietly, “Terror. Pure terror.”

“Philip, your sister was the one who was taken by the gunmen, correct?” 

“Yes,” he nodded slowly. “She didn’t deserve that. None of us did.” He looked down the line of chairs to the Theodosia, who nodded in agreement. Angelica tightened her grip around Angie.

“Do you resent the campaign or your fathers for doing this to you?”

“How could we?” Peter quipped. “They had no idea that two crazy men were going to hold us hostage. Mr. Washington was just doing what he thought was best. In the end, they did the right thing.”

“We love our fathers,” Theodosia added. Aaron looked at the ground.

“Let’s talk about the file. How difficult was the decision to hand it over?”

“Mr. Washington was not going to let our children die for a file of secrets,” Thomas insisted. 

“There was a bit of negotiation, but taking our children out of the dangerous situation was the right thing to do,” Alex said as calmly as he could.

“We turn now to a recording of the phone call between George Washington and Alexander Hamilton in the midst of the disaster.” 

The short phone call began to play, but unknown to the rest of them, footage of the attack played along with it. As soon as Angie glanced at the screen, she couldn’t look away. Angelica quickly grabbed her to take her away, but she wouldn’t budge.

Alexander stood up quickly. “You said you would tell us before you showed the footage!” He screamed, rushing out of view of the camera over to his daughter. After realizing what was happening, they moved it to follow the action. “Angie, honey, it’s okay. You’re safe,” he said frantically, crouching by her side.

An image of Angie herself popped up on the screen and she put her head in her hands, breathing heavily. “Philip, Philip…” She began to mutter.

“Turn it off, for God’s sake!” John screamed. He was standing behind Alex with a hand gripping his shoulder. Angelica had her niece’s hand wrapped around hers. Everyone else could only stand idly by.

“Philip!” She repeated, screaming in desperation.

Philip, who had been practically frozen to his seat before, rushed over and crouched directly in front of her. “Hey, I’m here. It’s okay,” he said soothingly.

She lifted her head up slightly. “Philip?” She asked.

He wiped her tears and grabbed her face, forcing her to look in his eyes. “I’m alive. We’re safe. Everything is going to be okay.”

She breathed heavily for a moment before replying, “Okay.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> As always, drop a comment or a kudos and I'll love you forever! (especially a comment). If you want to read more of my writing, my writing blog on tumblr is @andiknowsheishelpless
> 
> xoxo  
> Emily


	15. Acceptance

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> "I promise I won't do this again. I promise."

A few minutes after Angie’s panic attack, they cut to commercial and promised not show anymore footage of the attack. With her family around her and a clear view of her brother, Angie’s breathing became steady as she calmed down. 

“I think the three of us should finish this interview alone,” Thomas said, looking to Aaron and Alex. 

“I think that would be wise,” Aaron nodded. Alex heard them, but didn’t respond. His eyes were still locked on his daughter. John gave an assuring nod to the two, knowing that Alex would agree. 

Angie’s eyes snapped up, almost as if she were being taken out of a trance. She looked around at the room of worried and stressed people and sighed, “I-I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to- I’m not sure why-” She couldn’t explain her actions when she was in her right mind.

“Honey, it’s okay,” Alex assured her. “It’s not your fault.” He tried to place a comforting hand around her, but she squirmed away from him and squeezed her eyes shut.  
“I’m sorry,” she whimpered, placing her head in her hands. “I promise I won’t do this again. I promise. I know that I’m letting you down. I’m sorry.” 

Alex’s face became troubled. “Angie, you’re not letting me down-”

A woman in a headset with a clipboard in her hand cut him off. “Mr. Hamilton, Mr. Jefferson, and Mr. Burr, we need you back onstage to complete the interview.” Alex practically shot daggers into the woman with his eyes.

“Thank you, m’am,” Thomas replied politely, then went up to the stage to take his seat. Peter took that as a cue to go sit down next to Angelica, only one seat away from Angie. 

Aaron turned on one foot to go follow him, barely acknowledging his daughter at all. Theodosia shrunk into herself and leaned against the wall, trying not to let it affect her. He would notice any sort of weakness that she showed.

John leaned down and whispered into Alex’s ear. “Babe, go finish your interview. Philip and I will stay here with her. She’ll be okay.” Alex broke away from looking at Angie to look up into John’s eyes. 

He swallowed hard before saying, “Okay. Angie, I’ll be right over there, okay honey?” 

Angie nodded. “I’m fine, Dad. I promise.” Alex hesitantly stood up and made his way to the stage. Philip took his place in the seat next to Angie and then John sat down next to him. No one was paying attention to the interview anymore. 

Angie stared ahead with dead eyes. Philip tried to talk to her a few times, but he was met with defeaning silence and a few nods to show that she heard him. He gripped her hand so that she could feel his touch.

After seeing that Angie was stable, Angelica whispered to John, “Can we talk for a moment?” The two had never had a real conversation, but she figured now was the time to do so. She was confused, angry, and scared. She had never seen her niece act in the way that she did.

“Sure,” John nodded with a slightly confused look. She got up and walked to the corner of the studio while John followed. 

“How many outburts like that has she had?” Angelica asked in a harsh whisper.

“A lot during the night and a couple times during the day,” John sighed, running a hand through his hair.

“Is she seeing a therapist?”

“No, not yet, but we’re going to start looking for someone for her to see as soon as the whole interview thing is over.”

Angelica crossed her arms. “You should have sent her to see someone the first time this happened. You can’t take your time with this. These kind of things need intervention right away,” she scolded.

John had been fairly polite and understanding throughout this whole process, but he was at his tipping point. He had watched children that he cared for with his whole heart almost get shot, he had watched his boyfriend struggle throughout the night to get a wink of sleep without screaming, and he watched his daughter have panic attacks every time her brother left her side. It wasn’t easy.

“Who do you think you are, telling me what to do? I respect that these kids are your nieces, but frankly, you haven’t been around lately,” he spat. “This is a difficult time for all of us.”

Angelica’s mouth fell open and she took a step back. Still, her eyes were narrowed. She was not afraid of him or his words. “I have been around a lot longer than you, John Laurens, and you should be very careful with your words.”

“It doesn’t matter how long you’ve been around if you’re not around now,” John seethed.

Across the room, Theodosia had taken a seat next to Philip and Peter slid over to be next to Angie. Philip warned him with his eyes to not get any closer. “I’m so glad you’re here,” Philip whispered, gripping Theo’s hand. 

“I’m glad you’re here too,” Theodosia whispered back. “Is Angie going to be okay?”

“I can hear you, you know,” Angie quipped quietly. 

“She’s just worried about you Ang, take a rest,” Philip said, placing a calming hand on her leg. 

“Everybody’s worried about me,” she muttered back.

“For good reason,” Peter added.

“I don’t believe we asked for your opinion,” Philip said sharply. Peter ignored him. 

“Darling, you’re not acting like the same girl I fell in love with.” His tone was sweet and caring. Angie looked over at him and saw the same eyes of the boy that she fell in love with. She allowed him to put her hands in his. “There’s no need to be scared.”

“Hell no, get off of her,” Philip tensed, turning away from Theodosia and toward the two.

“Philip, it’s okay,” Angie tried to reason.

“No, I am not going to allow him to take advantage of you when you’re vulnerable!”

“I don’t understand why you’re being like this,” Angie replied calmly to his rage. “Peter and I are dating and I thought you had come to accept that.”

Peter smirked while Theodosia and Philip looked at one another, confused. “Angie, do you not remember what happened before the shooting?” Philip asked as nicely as he could.

“No,” she said to Philip innocently. Then she turned to Peter and asked, “Did something happen between us?” Philip’s eyebrows furrowed. He didn’t know what to do. 

“Nothing happened between us worth sharing,” Peter assured her. Angie smiled and rested her head on his shoulder. Philip kept his mouth shut for reasons that he wasn’t even quite sure of. 

When she was sure Angie wasn’t paying attention, Theodosia whispered, “Are you not going to tell her?”

“I just can’t add anything to her plate right now. I’m not going to let him stick around for very long, but I’ve gotta talk to my Pops first before I do anything to hurt her.” His slight smile was incredibly forced.

~

Three weeks later, Philip Hamilton was sitting at the kitchen table, waiting for Alex and John to come home, even though he knew it would probably be hours. He needed time to think. Angie was upstairs in her room and Will was in his. She had been getting better. Her panic attacks had been limited. They mostly came at night. Each time they ended, she promised that it would never happen again. It was always a desperate promise.

She had been seeing a therapist since two days after the interview. Philip often took her, just in case she freaked out in the room, even though Alex and John insisted he didn’t need to do that. If he was ever gone when she needed him, he felt immensely guilty. 

“Dad! Papi! You’re home early!” Philip exclaimed nervously, standing up at the sound of the door. The kids had taken to calling John ‘Papi’ since the shooting. At school, the other students had constantly been asking him about his relationship to John. It was easier to call him his dad than try to explain the whole thing.

They both started to set down their things as Alex said, “Yeah buddy, its Friday. We decided to take off a little early. What’s up?”

“I got some stuff in the mail,” Philip said hesitantly, going over to the counter to grab the packets. “They’re- ya know what, just look at them.” He practically shoved half of the packets into each of their hands.

Alex and John looked at them for a moment before looking up at the boy in wonder. “Philip, these are college acceptance letters,” John said slowly.

“This is fantastic Philip! God, look at these! Notre Dame, Columbia, Stanford, and Princeton? Do you see these?” Alex rambled, asking John the questions as if he weren’t already right there.

“Yes, Alex, I see them,” John laughed, flipping through them. “These really are fantastic, Philip. You’ve received scholarships too.”

“Hell yeah he did!” Alex exclaimed, dropping the letters on the counter and wrapping him up into a hug. “I’m so proud of you, kiddo.”

When he let go, John ruffled his hair and said, “Me too. With your GPA and work ethic, you certainly deserve it.” John knew that Philip was a front-runner to be the valedictorian of his class, but he wasn’t allowed to say anything. He wasn’t surprised that he received the acceptances that he did.

However, Philip didn’t look happy at all. Alex picked up on this and asked, “Philip, what’s wrong? Aren’t you excited?” He smiled softly.

“Of course I’m excited,” he sighed, sitting down at the counter. “But I can’t go to college next year.”

“You’re going to college,” Alex snapped. “Why wouldn’t you be going to college?”

“I can’t leave Angie alone. I can’t leave. I’ll take a gap year and wait until she’s feeling better,” he explained.

“You’re going to college,” Alex repeated with anger in his tone. He was not about to let his son sit at home for the next year. They would figure out a plan.

John held up a hand to take control of the situation. “Philip, we have no idea what kind of position Angie is going to be in the Fall. She could be perfectly fine in a couple of months. You can’t let your education take a backseat right now.”

“But what if she’s not better? What if she’s still having a panic attack every day and I’m not around to stop it? Every time she goes under, she’s looking for me to bring her back to reality and remind her that I’m not dead. I need to be here for her if she needs me.” 

“Philip, listen to me, you are not her father. You don’t need to guard her at all times. That’s why we’re here,” Alex replied lightly. 

“You deserve to go to college, Philip. You deserve to be happy,” John added.

“She deserves to be happy too.” At that moment, Angie appeared in the doorway of the kitchen with her arms crossed. Philip’s face fell. “How much of that did you hear?”

“Enough,” she replied. “You’re going to college, Philip. Dad and Papi are right. You’re going. I’ll be okay.”

“You always say you’re okay, and then you’re not,” Philip rebutted. 

“Philip,” Alex warned.

“There’s a lot of time between now and then,” Angie replied, still not leaving her place in the doorway. “I don’t want you to give anything up because of me.”

“It’s not just you,” he sighed. The three looked at Philip inquisitively. “I don’t want to leave any of you. It feels like it’s too soon with everything that’s happened.”

“Mijo, you’re a bright kid. It’s time for you to go out and get everything you’ve ever wanted,” Alex said with wonder in his voice. He had dreamed for a long time about giving his son the best opportunities possible. 

“Nothing has to be decided right now, Philip,” John said, landing somewhere in the middle of the two opinions. “You don’t have to put a deposit into any college until May 1st.”

“I’ve decided. I’m not going,” Philip stated, and then brushed past his sister coldly to go to his room.

“It’s all my fault,” Angie cried. “Everything is my fault.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> As always, drop a comment or a kudos and I'll love you forever!
> 
> xoxo  
> Emily


	16. Kitchen Table

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> "You're holding back feelings for the sake of other people."

Philip hadn’t left his room since his fight with his family. He immediately put on headphones and tuned out the world. It was his time to be alone. Downstairs, John and Alex were doing their best to comfort their daughter who dutifully believed that she was everything that was wrong with their family.

“He has to go to college,” she said for the millionth time that night. She sat in a chair at the kitchen table while John sat across from her and Alex stood behind him, lightly pacing. “I can’t be the reason he doesn’t go to college!”

“Honey, he’s going to go to college. We aren’t going to let him not go to college,” Alex said sharply. 

“We’ll talk to Philip, sweetheart. Whatever happens, I promise he won’t be staying here on your behalf,” John replied more sympathetically. It would be a tradgedy if Philip didn’t go to college, and everyone in that room knew that.

Angie drew in a sharp breath. “I don’t know what I’m going to do without him,” she said, as if realizing this for the first time. “I can’t keep having these ‘attacks’. It’s not fair to any of you. I don’t want you to put your lives on hold for me.”

“Angie, you are my life. We’re not putting anything on hold to be there for you,” Alex replied, softening his tone. “You’re still my kid, kid. No matter how grownup you think you are.”

“Besides, these attacks won’t last forever. It might be something you have to deal with every once in awhile, but they won’t become your life. I promise,” John added, being the voice of reason.

Angie placed her head in her hands and sighed, “I just wished none of this had ever happened.” 

Alex stopped pacing and looked at his daughter with love and regret. He placed his hand on John’s shoulder to steady himself. He wanted to apologize for everything he had done to hurt her, but he knew it would fall on deaf ears.

Still, Alex choked on his first word when he tried to speak. “I-I know, honey. I know.”

John looked back at Alex with slight confusion and immediately picked up on his cues of unrest. A million thoughts seemed to be running through his brain. He cleared his throat and said, “Angie, why don’t you go upstairs and rest while your dad and I make dinner. Don’t bother your brother. He’s had a long day.”

Angie looked between the two of them and then quickly said, “Okay, I love you guys,” and ran up the stairs to try to be alone without any issue.

“What do you want to make?” Alex asked, ruffling through some things in the fridge. John came up behind hip and wrapped his arms around the other man’s waist. Alex closed his eyes and chuckled slightly. “What’s this about?”

“You’re stressed,” John stated simply. “You’re holding back feelings for the sake of other people, you’re tired because you’re job is constantly on the line, and you just went through a major tradgedy.” He turned Alex around to face him in the embrace.

“You make my existence sound bleak,” he replied with a pained smile. 

“You don’t have to keep anything from me,” John continued. Alex smiled as he pecked his boyfriend’s lips. It was times like these that he remembered how lucky he truly was.

He allowed himself to lose the smile on his face. “Everything you said couldn’t be more true. I feel like this whole mess is my fault. The files, the shooting, the issues at work, the mental instability of our children, all of it. Every time I see Angie cry, my chest hurts. I let everyone down.”

John listened to the man with sympathy. He often felt guilty because he couldn’t do more to help his family. Alex was in the center of every problem. He couldn’t even imagine being in his position. “Alex, babe, no one blames you for the way things have gone down. You have to know that.”

“I do, but I can’t help it. I played a small hand in all of it. It’s enough to keep me up at night.” Alex paused and John pulled him into his chest. He had felt Alex toss and turn. Sometimes, he gripped him tight at night just to get him to rest. 

“When the Reynolds Articles were published, I let my family down monumentally. Ever since the shooting, I’ve felt that same guilt over and over again. It feels like I’m disappointing Eliza every single day that they’re unhappy.”

The truth that spilled out of Alex was the most John had pulled from him in a long time. He didn’t know Eliza, but he knew that she would have supported Alex in the same way that he was. From what he had heard about her, she might have been even more loving.

“Alexander, you’re doing everything you can to help your kids. I may have not known Eliza personally, but I do know that anyone that has ever fallen in love with you knows what he or she is getting. She forgived you for what happened in the past. She would have been standing behind you one hundred percent now.”

Alex looked into John’s eyes for a moment and couldn’t say anything but, “I love you.”

John smiled. “I love you too, Alexander.” 

The moment was lost when Alex’s phone buzzed multiple times in his back pocket. He broke away from John’s embrace to check the messages. In a time frame of about ten seconds, he had received seven texts from his sister in law, Angelica.

“Thomas and I got into a huge fight / I’m coming over. / Alex. / I’m coming over. / I hope you’re not busy. / Stop having sex with John and text me back. / I’m coming anyway.” 

Alex chuckled to himself and sent her a quick ‘okay’. “That was Angelica. Apparently she and Thomas got into a fight. She’s coming over.” John deflated slightly in response, but did his best to keep the smile on his face. 

“Then I should let you know that she and I had a sort of falling out a couple of weeks ago,” he replied hesitantly, running a hand through his hair uncomfortably. In an attempt to keep his cool, he leaned against the refridgerator with ease.

Alex raised an eyebrow. “What do you mean? When did this happen?” He asked with concern. John and Angelica were two of the most important people in his life beside his kids. He didn’t need them fighting.

“At the interview. We were talking about Angie’s situation and things got a little heated,” John explained. 

Alex sighed, squeezing his eyes shut and pursing his lips together. Even when he came to look at John, his eyes were slightly narrowed. “She’s her aunt, John. She’s concerned. I know she hasn’t been around much, but for the year after Eliza died, she was my rock.”

“Alex, in my defense, you didn’t hear what she said to me. I was defending my place in this family. Honestly, you either consider the kids to be mine or you don’t.” The words spilled out of John’s mouth before he could catch them. 

Alex looked hurt for a moment. “John, the kids consider you family and so do I. You’re ours forever, like it or not.” He smiled, trying to break the tension. John nodded and looked away for a moment.  
“I’m going to need your support here, Alex,” he responded quietly. He had been supporting Alex for so long. He almost felt guilty asking for something for his own gain.  
“Hey,” Alex pleaded, trying to draw the man’s eyes toward him. When he still couldn’t catch them, he gently touched his chin and gently kissed the sad smile off of his lips. “You’ve always got my support.”  
The door to their apartment flying open interrupted them. Angelica huffed as she walked through the doorway without being invited and plopped down into a chair at the kitchen table. “Making use of that spare key, I see,” Alex said, cracking a smile. John folded his arms across his chest. 

“I’m doing the right thing!” She exclaimed, throwing her head down onto the table, her hair covering the entirety of her head and face. 

Alex went over to the kitchen table and took a seat in front of her while John passively leaned against the counter close by. “Okay, I’m gonna need some more details here, Ang,” Alex replied in his trademark Dad voice.

She picked her head up off the table and looked up at Alex with fire in her eyes. “I wasn’t trying to be a parent! The kid was being a little asshole!” She exclaimed, and then slammed her head back down on the table.

“Oh god, Angelica,” Alex sighed. Angelica had always been a very forward person and Alex knew that she probably over stepped her boundaries. No matter how much he hated Jefferson, he was still a father and he got to choose what he did with his son. 

“No, no you don’t understand!” She yelled, still as angry as before. “Philip made me aware of the situation between Angie and Peter, and I decided to talk to him about it,   
but-”  
“I’m sorry, what situation between Angie and Peter?” John asked, stepping in towards them. Angelica looked at him in surprise, as if noticing him there for the first time.

“Do you not know?” She asked incredulously. Angelica took their silence and nervous glances at one another as a yes. “Peter was abusive at the end of their relationship. He smashed a glass on her hand. He pushed her around and held her too tightly. From the screenshots Philip sent me, it looks like he was really manipulative.” She spoke to them with sensitivity. She knew she was just adding fire to the already burning flame.

“Philip knew about this?” Alex asked, trying to process the whole thing. 

“Yes, but don’t be mad at him for not saying anything,” she added quickly. “He’s been through enough. He just didn’t want to give either of you another thing to deal with. Besides, she’s not in the state to be dealing with any sort of relationship right now.”

John wanted to ask her how she would know that, but he held his tongue. Now was not the time to be petty. “So, are they still together?” John asked, trying to get the details straight.

“Philip claims that she was about to break up with him, but with the shooting it seems she’s forgotten about the whole ordeal.”

Alex looked back at John and said, “Philip has never liked Peter. We should really be careful here, but it’s clear we need to step in.” John nodded in silence. “So, explain to me why Thomas was upset that you tried to talk about this?”

“He screamed at me for ‘accusing his son of such terrible things’. Eventually, Peter left but he and I continued to argue. Neither of us would back down. It ended on him telling me that I wasn’t Peter’s mother and that I never would be.” At first, she spoke bitterly but by the end she just looked sad. It was clear that Thomas was a big part of her life and what she thought her future would be.

“Angelica, you know this isn’t about Peter. Thomas knows what his son might be capable of. This is about the boundaries in your relationship,” Alex replied sympathetically.  
“You and John have been together for just as long as Thomas and I have and the kids are already calling him their Dad,” Angelica snapped.

“Angelica, you and I both know that’s different. You’d be replacing Peter’s mom. My kids are just adding an extra Dad,” Alex tried.

“Still, you let him act like a parent! You let him be a part of this family!” She yelled, motioning to John. “He’s more involved than I am with the kids at this point!” It took all John had to bite his tongue.

“You’ve been with Thomas, Angelica! You know the door is always open to you, you’ve just chosen not to come around!” Alex rebutted, fighting for John like he said he would. “Angie and Philip needed you and you weren’t there, Angelica. You were with your boyfriend.”

Angelica’s face fell, hurt by Alex’s words. There was so much he didn’t know. “This isn’t what I wanted to talk about tonight,” she replied softly, coming down from her angry high. Alex let himself relax as well. 

“You need to talk to Thomas,” Alex said calmly. 

Angelica took a deep breath and said, “I’m going to go say hello to the kids. I’m sorry for being such a disappointment to you.” She went up the stairs without another word, and Alex let her go. As far as he was concerned, he had said everything he needed to say.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> a little bit of a filler chapter before we get to the action again...
> 
> let me know what you think is going to happen next! you never know, you might inspire me :)
> 
> as always, drop a comment or a kudos and I'll love you forever.
> 
> xoxo  
> Emily


	17. Mothers

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> "It's my reality."

“My mom is dead,” Angie said quietly. She sat stifly in the chair of her therapist’s office, going through the motions that they had practiced. She cleared her throat when she became choked up. “My mom is dead. Peter is my ex-boyfriend. He wasn’t good to me. A shooter came into my school and held a gun to my head. No one was shot. Philip is okay. I am okay. I am safe.”

“That was good,” the therapist said patiently. “Is there anything else?”

“My dad is dating someone else. His name is John. He’s my school principal. My aunt Angelica is dating Peter’s dad. Philip is dating Theodosia. My dad works for George Washington. He’s running his campaign. We have security now. We’re all safe.”

“Very good, Angie,” she smiled. “Do you want to remind me why we do that?”

“It’s my reality. When I have a panic attack, I need to remind myself of what my true reality is,” Angie replied, her cheeks becoming hot from embarassment. 

The therapist, picking up on this, said, “Angie, it’s okay that you forget. It’s not your fault.”

Angie shook her head. “I know, but I know it hurts my family when I do. I think it especially hurts Philip when I forget that my mom isn’t dead. My dad has never heard me say it, so I think Philip keeps it from him. I don’t tell him either.”

Angie always spoke very simply when she was in her therapist’s office. Short, choppy sentences were the only way she could figure out how to convey what she was feeling without crying. Her therapist didn’t mind, in fact, she probably found it easier to understand when she spoke that way.

“Do you think that this is something that you should be telling your dad?”

“I don’t know, maybe. I don’t know what good it’ll do.”

“It’s best to make your parents aware of what’s going on. That’s the only way they can help you, Angie. Communication is crucial in times like these.” She sounded like she was quoting straight from a pyschology textbook.

“Okay,” Angie muttered. “I’ll think about it.”

“That’s all I ask.”

~ 

Angelica had left their apartment two hours before with a cold stare and a slam of the front door behind her. The kids came down and asked about the fight, but John and Alex didn’t give them many details. The conversation was left with the two teenagers pleading for them to not let their aunt be taken away from them too. Alex promised that wouldn’t be the case.

Around 9:30 there was an urgent sounding knock on the door. John grunted as he got up from the couch and mumbled something about how it was late and that no one should be at their door.

He was prepared to make a bunch of snarky comments in their direction until he found Theodosia Burr standing in its frame. “I-I’m sorry,” she stuttered. “I didn’t know where else to go.”

It was clear she had been crying. Dried tears streaked her face and there were smudges of mascara underneath her eyes. John quickly ushered her in and Alex, hearing her voice, got up to go greet her. 

“Honey, what’s going on?” John asked as pleasantly as he could. When Alex saw the distressed state of the girl, he went to the stairs and called for Philip.

“M-My dad,” she stuttered again. Alex and John glanced at one another in nervousness. “We got into a huge fight. H-He kicked me out. I didn’t know where else to go.”

Philip came downstairs just in time to here the tail end of what his girlfriend was saying. He went straight to her and wrapped his arms around her waist, allowing her to fall into his chest. “He really kicked you out?” Philip asked.

“We never fight. It was like a million fights put into one. Oh, it was so terrible. I’ve never seen him like that before,” she whimpered. 

“Does he know where you are?” Alex asked softly. Inside, he couldn’t believe that Aaron was capable of kicking his own daughter out of the house. As far as he knew, Theodosia was his world. No matter how angry he was with his children, he would never even think of kicking any of them out of the house.

“I didn’t tell him. He might assume that I’m here.” Her voice sounded tired, like she didn’t really care whether her father knew where she was or not. Theodosia has always been a good kid. This wasn’t like her at all but, then again, it wasn’t like Aaron either.

“I’m going to send your father a quick text, okay?” Alex asked, already pulling out his phone.   
Theodosia nodded, but then muttered, “He’s not going to care.”

“He’ll care,” John assured her.

“What did you even fight about?” Philip asked incredulously. “What could possibly make him kick you out of the house?”

Theodosia opened her mouth, but nothing came out right away. All of her memories were pushed together into one big mess that she could barely remember. “You,” she started. “His job. How we never say anything that could possibly be unpleasant.” She paused, clearly not wanting to talk about the last part of their fight. In the end, she took a deep breath and told them. “My mother. How she left.”

A few weeks after Theodosia was born, her mom left a note on the counter, packed her bags, and ran. She said she couldn’t handle being a mother. She said that she still loved Aaron, but it wasn’t enough to make her stay.

Theodosia knew deep down that she hadn’t done anything wrong, but that wasn’t the issue. She would always know that there was a small part of her father’s mind that believed that it was her fault. It didn’t help that she looked so much like her mother. He hadn’t seen her since the morning she ran.

“Well, you can definitely stay the night here. Philip, why don’t you take Theo up to Angie’s room? She can sleep there,” John said. “If Angie isn’t doing well, send her to our room.” Philip nodded and the two of them made their way upstairs as Theodosia tried to regain her composure.

When Alex was sure the kids were out of earshot, his face turned red with anger. “I texted Aaron to let him know that his daughter was with us and all he did was reply with a simple ‘okay’! What’s wrong with him?”

“The whole situation really is strange,” John agreed. “It must have been some fight.”  
“I’m going to kill him tomorrow at work,” Alex seethed.

“Be careful,” John warned. “You don’t know what really happened. We didn’t get all of the details.”  
“It doesn’t matter. Nothing warrants kicking your kid out of the house.”

~

Angie ended up sleeping in Philip’s room after her fear of having a panic attack arose. She didn’t want Theodosia to see her that way, especially after the night she had. At the same time, she felt like a child sleeping with her fathers. All of the talk about Theodosia’s mom planted the word in her head. She needed to tell her parents, but every time she went to do so, her throat constricted. She just couldn’t get herself to do it.

Philip slipped into his room around one in the morning after staying with Theodosia for as long as he could. He found his sister sleeping soundly and did his best not to wake her.

However, Angie woke up anyway. She saw a shadow lurking in the distance and it felt like a weight had just dropped onto her chest. He was back. The man with the gun. His partner was waiting in the hallway, ready to come and kill her and Philip. 

The sharp gasp from his sister alerted Philip that she was awake and not in a good place. Any time she had an attack; her breathing became short and quick. He started to walk toward her, but her voice stopped him.

“Don’t come any closer! Please, don’t!” She yelled, scooching to the back of her makeshift bed and eventually shoving her face into her knees.

“Angie, it’s just me, Philip,” he tried to convince her quietly. She didn’t believe him and continued to shake her head in disagreement. When he found that there was nothing he could do, he called out for Alex and John. “Dad! Papi!”

“Don’t kill me!” Angie screamed again. “Philip! Philip where are you?” 

It wasn’t long before Alex and John came bursting through the door. Philip tried to take another step forward, but Angie was having none of it. She was throughly convinced that the man standing in front of her wasn’t her brother, but the shooter that had taken over their school.

Alex and John rushed to either side of her and then Alex gripped her hand, trying to bring reality back to her. “Angie, baby,” he said soothingly. “It’s okay, honey.”

John tried to put a hand on her back in comfort so that she could feel his touch, but she quickly jerked away. “No! I want my mom! Where is she?”

For a moment, Alex was completely taken aback. “Angie-” he started, but he didn’t really know what to say. Out of everything, that wasn’t what he expected at all. Philip didn’t look very surprised, however.

“I want my mom. Not another Dad,” she said through sobs. The room fell silent. On the inside, Alex and Philip were thinking that if Eliza were around, things would be different. John tried not to let Angie’s words bother him. 

After a moment, her breathing slowed and the attack seemed to subside, but she continued to cry. Philip decided to come closer and Angie didn’t stop him. When she finally came back to reality, she slowly lifted up her head and surveyed the worried looks in the room.

“I’m sorry,” she said, trying to catch her breath. 

“You never need to apologize,” Alex insisted as he kept his grip on her hands. After a second, he couldn’t stop himself from asking, “Angie, you know that your mother isn’t alive, right?”

“Yes I know,” she whimpered, squeezing her eyes shut. “S-Sometimes I forget that she isn’t here when I have my attacks. O-Only Philip has actually heard me say something like that.” 

“Philip, you have been keeping a lot from us lately,” Alex said, trailing off with a slightly accusative tone. 

“I thought I was doing what was best for the family,” Philip replied quietly. “Besides, what else have I been keeping from you?”

Alex and John glanced at each other, knowing fully that he had kept their daughter’s abusive relationship from the two of them. But, now was not the time to talk about something like that. “It’s not important right now,” John said sternly, which stopped Philip from saying anything more.

“Papi, I’m so sorry. I love you. I miss my mom, but I’m glad you’re here with me,” Angie said almost desperately, as if she had ruined something between the two of them.

“I know, Angie,” he replied, trying to assure her. Then, he wrapped an arm around her shoulder and squeezed her tightly, a small smile appearing on her face.

“It’s going to be alright,” Alex said. He was trying to convince everyone around him while trying to convince himself at the same time. “We’re going to be alright.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> sorry this took so long! a bit of writer's block. we're approaching the end of this story...
> 
> drop a comment or kudos and i'll love you forever!
> 
> xoxo  
> Emily


	18. Breaking Point

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> "It's going to be okay, Alexander. I promise."

The next day at work, Aaron was going over a couple of files at the water cooler when Alex came barreling through the elevator doors. “Burr!” He called out with disgust in his voice, not pausing until he was practically an inch from Aaron’s nose.

At first, he was scowling, but then Aaron forced himself to bring a smile to his lips. “Good morning, Hamilton,” he said with an even tone. If anything, his calmness brought even more anger to Alex’s face.

“You’re just going to say ‘good morning’ like your daughter didn’t stay at my house last night because you kicked her out?” He spit angrily, still not wavering from his close proximity to his co-worker. 

At this point, the entire office was staring at them. Even George had stepped out of his office to see what the commotion was. When he saw that Alex was involved, he yelled, “Burr! Hamilton! My office!” When they paused in their place, he added, “Now!”

They glanced at each other and then Alex sarcastically motioned for Aaron to go first. He obliged, but with a quick roll of his eyes. George tried to ignore their childishness, but the look of displeasure on his face was unmistakable. Swiftly, he closed the door behind them.

“Would the two of you like to explain why you just made a scene on my floor?” George asked, subtly closing the blinds of his office to block out the nosy workers peering in.

Of course, Alex had to have the first word. “George-” he paused when George glared at him and corrected himself, “Mr. Washington, with all due respect, Mr. Burr kicked his daughter out of his house last night. We housed her for the night, but Mr. Burr didn’t even care.”

“That’s a very unfair accusation, Mr. Hamilton,” Aaron started to say. 

Suprisingly, Alex was not the one to interrupt him. George held up a hand and asked, “You really kicked your daughter out of the house?” His tone was soft, almost in an unbelieving kind of sense. 

“We had a fight. I needed the night to cool down. It was never going to be for good,” Aaron grimaced, clearly holding some of the details back. 

“That doesn’t justify anything! You and I both know what this is about, and I honestly can’t believe you would stoop so low,” Alex shot at him. Luckily, he was a safe distance away from Aaron, or else Alex might not have been afraid to get physical.

“What exactly do you believe this is about, Alexander?” Aaron asked sarcastically, as if he knew that he was above Alex in this argument. He then placed his hands in his pockets and stood a bit taller.

“It’s not about your daughter witholding information from you, it’s the fact that she’s dating a Hamilton.” Alex said his own name with mock annoyance, taking a step toward his opponent to show that he didn’t plan on backing down.

At first, Aaron didn’t say anything and, when he was about to, Alex stepped in once again. “And, I’ll remind you that I am a politician, and I am well versed in finding out the dirty truth. Not only are you mad that Theodosia is dating a Hamilton, you’re still not over the fact that your wife left you almost seventeen years ago because she couldn’t handle being a mom. But, have you ever stopped and thought that maybe it wasn’t your daughter’s fault your wife left? Maybe it was yours. Maybe she just didn’t love you enough to stay.”

The silence after Alexander’s speech was heavy and thick. After a couple of seconds, Alex backed off and took a couple steps away from Aaron, running a hand through his hair and over his face. Maybe it was too harsh, but it needed to be said.

Aaron’s eyes were cast down to the floor, but eventually he looked straight up at George and said, “If you don’t mind sir, I think I’ll show myself out. I’ll be picking up my daughter after school, Alexander.” George nodded and Aaron turned on one foot to leave the office.

When the door closed, George sighed and said, “Alexander-”

“Sir, I know what you’re going to say, but this was a personal matter-”

“No, Alexander, you don’t know what I’m going to say,” George replied firmly. Slightly taken aback, Alex shut his mouth. George paused for a moment, deciding his words carefully. “Do you want to be here, Alexander?”

Alex’s face contorted into confusion. “Sir?”

“I certainly mean no offense. You’re just going through a rough time with your family and you have a lot of personal ties at work. I can help you find another job if you want to leave this whole thing behind.”

Alex scoffed; a smile tugging at his lips because he believed that what George was saying must have been a joke. But, when the stern look on his boss’s face did not waver, he hurriedly said, “George, I love working here. You have to know that. My job is a really big part of my life.”  
“I’ve never doubted that, Alexander. You’re intelligent and this job is challenging, but I know you have enough challenges at home-”

“Sir, we’re right at the tail end of the primaries-”

“I’m not firing you, Alexander! You don’t have to convince me. I’m just giving you the option if you want to take it.” There was a beat of uncomfortable silence as Alex thought over his options before speaking again.

He shook his head. “No. I need this job.” George nodded. He had a slight look of pride on his face, but he didn’t allow it to turn into a smile. Alex gave him a nod of affirmation before turning to leave.

“Alexander?”

“Yes sir?”

“Thank you for everything you’ve sacrficed.” The word sacrifice struck a cord with him. What he had done didn’t feel like a sacrifice. His kids had been the ones to make sacrifices, not him. He kept his dangerous job. He wasn’t in the room when a gunman shot up his kid’s school. He just kept living.

Still, there wasn’t much he could say, so he just gave a slow nod of the head and agreed.“You’re welcome, sir.”

~

It was nine o’clock at night when John was leaning against the counter scrolling through his phone. Alex still hadn’t come home, but had promised through a series of texts that he would be soon. More than three weeks after the incident, the school was still shaken up. As principal, he was handling a lot of concerned phone calls from parents. The stress was never ending.

Alex, on the other hand, wasn’t doing much better. When he walked through the door at 9:07 PM, John immediately saw the bags under his eyes and the lines that crossed his forehead. He straightened his spine and put his phone into his pocket to focus all of his attention on Alex.

“Hey,” he said, subtly waiting for Alex to speak. He placed his brief case down on the chair in the corner of the kitchen and walked over to the kitchen table and slumped over into one of its chairs.

“Hey. Did Burr come by?” He asked, not looking up at John, though not on purpose. His hands were clasped together and he tried to take even, long breaths.

“Yeah, a couple of hours ago. He didn’t say much. Just took Theodosia and left,” John told him. He kept his distance from Alex, hoping to give him a bit of space to let go of whatever was holding him back.

“Yeah, well, that might have been my fault,” he replied, leaning back in his chair and putting his hands over his head. “I sort of screamed at him on the floor and then attacked him in George’s office.”

“Physically?”

“No.”

“That’s good.” John paused. “Now tell me what’s really bothering you.”

Alex was so tense that he physically and mentally had to unclench his jaw to say what he wanted to. “I am the worst father in the world.” Each word had its own sort of punch. He wasn’t trying to be overdramatic or draw attention to himself. It was something he truly felt down to his core.

John didn’t deny it. He knew that would do no good. “What makes you say that?”

Alex looked up at John, a sort of fear and desperation in his eyes. “George asked me if I wanted to keep my job. He thinks the whole thing is too difficult for me right now. He offered to get me a new job and I turned his offer down.”

He paused, as if that was the whole story. John couldn’t help but ask, “I’m sorry, Alex, but I don’t see how that makes you a terrible father.”

“It was selfish, John!” He exploded. Then, he said a bit quieter, “Once George wins the election, which he will, I’m going to be at work all the time. Eventally, I’m not going to be there for my children. Work is going to become my life again.”

"It won't if you don't let it."

“Eliza wouldn’t have let any of this happen.” John paused and broke away from Alex’s gaze. He balled up his fists, trying to hold his feelings back, but was failing. The anger was written all over his face. “John-” Alex started to say, realizing the harshness of his words.

“No, Alex, don’t,” he replied softly, but with a stern tone. “George was right when he said that thing’s are hard for you right now. He was also right when he said that you have a choice. Not only about work, but about this.” He motioned to the space between the two of them. Alex stood up, shaking his head slightly. “I can’t be Eliza. I’ll never be Eliza. I love you, Alexander. You need to make sure you love me, too.”

Alex took a step toward him, but John crossed over to the other side of the kitchen and picked up his keys. “John, don’t do this. Please,” he begged, his voice cracking on his final word.

John’s face softened as he grabbed the doorknob to the apartment and then turned to face him. “It’s going to be okay, Alexander. I promise.” With that, he was gone.

Alex had to lean against the table to keep from falling to his knees. He sobbed at as quiet of a volume as he could. It was minutes before he heard the pitter patter of feet run down the stairs to greet him. 

“Daddy?” Will asked. Alex quickly wiped his eyes and his son ran toward him at such an intense speed that when Alex picked him up he swung to the side.

“Hi buddy,” he replied sweetly, holding him out so that he could see his face. He was smiling wide and had a piece of paper in his hands, which he immediately handed to his father. “What’s this?” 

“I had to draw our family for school,” Will replied simply. He pointed to each person as he went a long. “There’s me, Pip, Angie, you, and Papi.”

They were all drawn as personalized stick figures and, in his little kid handwriting, ‘MY FAMILY’ was written at the top. Alex took a deep breath. “This is fantastic, buddy!” 

He may have only been a child, but Will certainly got one thing right. They were a family and there’s no turning back on family.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I don't know exactly how many chapters are left, but their aren't many. Enjoy the ride. Drop a comment or a kudos and I'll love you forever!
> 
> xoxo  
> Emily


	19. What the Future Holds

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> "What happens is what's meant to happen."

“Dad?” Angie asked when she walked into her father’s room that night. She had planned on asking about going back to school, but the sight in her father’s room was enough to forget that thought all together. Her father was in bed at nine thirty at night, just staring at a wall. She had never seen her father’s face so blank. Catiously, she continued, “Where’s Papi?”

Alex looked up at her after her second question. His mouth hung open, slack, as he searched for the words to say. Still, for the first time in his life, he came up with nothing. Seeing something was truly wrong, Angie asked her question again. “Dad, where’s Papi?”

He cast his eyes downward, trying to decide what to do next. To give himself a few more moments, he said quietly, “Go get your brother. I’ll tell you together.” Angie shot him a puzzled look and then slowly went to Philip’s room. As possible answers popped into her brain, she became angrier by every passing second.

When Angie was out of sight, Alex sighed and placed his head into his hands. Then, he checked his phone for the millionth time, hoping to see a text from John. Once again, he found nothing. 

“Pop, what’s going on?” Philip asked when they came back. They hovered by the doorway, as if they entered, the truth might be worse. Alex shifted in his bed, sitting up completely on its edge. 

“Come sit down,” he replied. Hesitantly, the two took their places on the end of the bed. They shot one another worried glances and their facial expressions said everything. Angie and Philip could read each other like books. Angie was mad; unbelievably mad. Philip was just scared. He didn’t want things to go back to the way they were before.

Alex closed his eyes. “John left,” he said simply, trying to take the emotion out of his voice.   
Angie stared her father down with fire in her eyes. “You cheated on him, didn’t you?” Philip’s head snapped to look at her, a disapproving expression displayed on his face. Alexander just looked hurt. Out of all of the things she could have said, that was far from what he was expecting.

“Angelica-” Philip interjected.

“No! He cheated on our mother, so what’s to stop him from doing the same to John? Besides, why else would he leave? He loves us.” She said the word love like it was a lifeline. It wasn’t just a word. John was their family. That was a different kind of love.

Alex had to bite his lip until his daughter finished to hold back the vulgar words he wanted to say in response. When she said her last word, he tried to be calm. “I did not cheat on him, Angie. I would never do that someone again or to the two of you again. I promise.”

Angie’s face softened and she took a breath. Maybe it was harsh thing to say, but she needed to get that out of the way. She couldn’t have stopped herself from asking if she had tried. She had a duty to her mother.

“John left because I brought up your mother,” Alex continued. “I said that she wouldn’t have let any of this happen to us, which obviously isn’t true. I was angry.” He paused, swallowing hard. It was his fault John left. He could never shut his mouth.

Angie’s face turned white as her gaze fell to the floor. Frantically, she tried to compile all of her thoughts into one, coherent sentence. “The night I had my panic attack I said I wanted a mom. That wasn’t true, I want him! It’s my fault.”

Alex shook his head. “Angie, look at me.” She turned her head to meet his eyes. “This is not your fault. A lot of things led up to him leaving. This relationship, though very serious, is still new. We’re still figuring it out, but we’re going to get him back. I promise.”

“You shouldn’t make promises you can’t keep,” Philip said quietly. He wasn’t one to crticize his father. He looked up to him immensely. But, this was one thing he felt he needed to bring up. When Alex gave him a questioning look, Philip continued, “You’ve just been saying that word a lot. You shouldn’t make promises like that.”

Alex nodded slowly, “You’re right.” 

~

Angie woke up to her alarm blaring the next morning. Unlike a normal school day, Angie had a bit of skip in her step as she hopped out of bed and threw a bathrobe over her clothes. She was going to show everyone that she was ready; that she was better.

She knocked on Philip’s door, knowing fully well that he was awake. But, due to the fact that he was not a morning person, he muttered a barely audible ‘what’ and Angie opened the door.

“Why are you awake?” He asked when he saw his sister. He was half dressed, still sitting in bed, clearly not looking forward to the day ahead of him. He could not match his sister’s bright smile in anyway, shape, or form.

She pranced over to him and fell lightly onto his bed. “I’m going to go back to school,” she stated, her happy expression evident and clear. Philip, on the other hand, just looked confused and tired.

“Did Dad say you could?” He asked, closing his eyes and running his hands over his face. Her face fell slightly. She was hoping he would be excited, but it didn’t seem like that would be the case.

“Well, no,” she said, pausing for a moment and then speaking quickly. “But I’m going to convince him. I’m going to go back to school.” She smiled again, hoping he would take that as a response that was good enough. Of course, it wasn’t.

“Do you really think that’s such a good idea? You should take your time with this, Ang.   
Stepping back into that classroom isn’t easy by any means.” He looked down to the floor for a moment and tried to push thoughts of the past from his mind. Every time he walked into his journalism class, he had to focus on his breathing or else he wouldn’t be able to breath at all.

“I’ve wanted to go back to school for awhile. I know that I can do it, Philip.” There was strength in her words, but Philip didn’t believe her. Every time she had an attack, she said she wouldn’t have another, but she couldn’t stop them. It wasn’t her fault. “Besides, if I go back to school, Dad and Papi will have to talk.” 

Philip raised an eyebrow and paused. “You should stop calling him that.”

“Who?”

“John. You should stop calling him Papi. We don’t know if he’s coming back to us.” He spoke plainly to his sister, trying to be as honest as he could. They had been walking on eggshells around her lately, but that needed to end eventually.

Angie’s eyebrows knit together, slightly in frustration, slightly out of confusion. “Of course he’s coming back. He loves us, Philip.”

“You have to face reality and I have to see him today at school, where he might not even talk to me for all I know. Don’t convince yourself otherwise,” he replied harshly. He then looked at her for a moment, waiting for a witty rebuttal, but she just sat there with her mouth partly open. 

“I have to get ready for school. You should go.” Philip then stood up and turned his back to her, flipping through his closet. Finally getting the cue that she was no longer welcome, Angie stood up and left the room a few seconds later. The smile that was on her face when she came in had disappeared.

~

“So how’d it go with your father?” The busy world of the school was bustling around them, but Philip and Theodosia found a bit of peace of their own at a table in the courtyard. They hadn’t spoken since Aaron brought her home after their fight.

“Well, it happened,” she sighed. Philip raised an eyebrow, so she continued, “We had a long discussion and diplomatically agreed that we had a lot of fundamental differences that we probably won’t ever be able to agree upon.” She said the word ‘diplomatically’ like it was poison on her tongue.

Philip frowned. He couldn’t imagine having a relationship with his father like Theodosia’s. “I’m sorry, Theo. That must have been really hard.”

She shook her head. “Surprisingly, it wasn’t. I’m leaving for college soon. I feel like I’m free. I don’t have to be a Burr if I don’t want to be, you know? I can just be me.” She almost smiled. 

Philip studied her a moment, a genuine smile plastered on his face. Every time he looked at her, he couldn’t help but smile. He loved her. It was such a real, wonderful love, too. He’d walk through fire for her. “Have you considering committing to one of your schools?” He asked. 

“It’s between Columbia and Brown, but I think I’m leaning towards Brown. I think its time to leave the city, but I wanted to talk to you first.” Choosing between Brown and Columbia seemed like the most pretentious choice a person would have to make, but Philip was unbelievably proud. His girlfriend was a genius. “Are you staying in the city?”

Philip’s face fell. He didn’t know what to say. “I don’t know if I’m going at all,” he said quietly.   
“What? Of course you’re going to college. Did you get rejected? Because I swear to god I will fucking fight any school that had the nerve to-”

If there was one thing Theodosia was, it was fiercly loyal to the people she loved. “No, Theo, I got into Stanford. I just don’t know if-“

They were also both very good at cutting one another off. “You got into Stanford? Babe!” She exclaimed, kissing him quickly. “You’re going. You have to go! That’s just non-negotiable.” 

Philip smirked. “Both you and I know very well that everything is negotiable.” She laughed slightly, shaking her head. “But I don’t know if I should go with the way things are with my family right now.”

“Philip, you have a larger chance of getting struck by lightning than getting into Stanford University. You’re one in a million. You can’t give that up.” She grabbed his hands to prove her point. She believed, down to her core, every word she said.

“I’d have to leave you,” he replied. 

“Then that’s what you’ll do. You’ll leave me, but you’ll come back too. We can make it through anything.”

“And everything.”

“Anything and everything.”

~

“John, this is Alex, again. We have to talk about this. I’m using every free moment of my workday to try to get ahold of you but I think eventually I’m going to fill up your inbox because you know that I’ve never been able to shut up. Let’s fix this, John. Please. I need-” A beep ending his voicemail cut him off.

He made sure that his volume was all the way up and then stuck his phone into his pocket. He hadn’t been counting how many times he had called John because he was pretty sure that the number would be sad. He just wanted to hear his voice.

To get his mind off the whole thing, he hastened his stride and walked into Washington’s office. “Glad I caught you, sir. I just wanted to congratulate you.” George looked up from his computer screen and smiled.

“What for, Alexander?”

“We’re a day away from the end and it looks like you’re going to cinch this nomination.” George grabbed two glasses from the side of his office and poured a bit of expensive liquid into each of them. 

Placing one into Alex’s hand, he replied, “Thank you, Alexander. Your efforts will not be forgotten.” 

“I should hope not, sir,” he chuckled. Then, he went back into business mode, saying, “The only state we’re really unsure of is Ohio, but-”

“Alexander, I don’t want to talk about this. What happens is what’s meant to happen.” He leaned against his desk. “I’ll make two more speeches tomorrow. One during the vote and one after that either concedes or accepts the nomination of the Democratic Party. Then, we’ll move forward.”

“To the Presidency.”

“And to Chief of Staff.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Drop a comment or a kudos and I'll love you forever!
> 
> xoxo  
> Emily


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